Corrie Canuck

An Audience with Coronation Street is going to repeat Tuesday December 25 2007 from 7:00 pm – 8:00 pm!

I know you’ll be sitting around the turkey table, so be sure to set your vcr/pvr/tivo because this is a one shot deal, babies.

The house has gone up for sale at Jamie’s and he and his new houseguest discuss looking for new digs, but Leanne as usual has a plan in place. She has decided she is going to break into Janice’s flat (with her permission) and squat there while Janice is in France. She uses her Battersby skills by taking a credit card to slip the lock without success , all while wearing a lovely cocktail gown! Jamie watches her in action, or inaction when Liam walks by. He is formally introduced to Leanne and tells her she is doing it all wrong. He takes a step back and kicks the door down, like a proper gentleman. In the flat, after getting Jamie to do some heavy lifting – Leanne clearly smitten with Liam asks Jamie various questions about her potential new victim er sorry, friend . Does anyone else notice all female characters on Corrie with brown hair slowly become blonde?Tracy tells David to back off after he gropes her leg under the table at Roy’s Rolls. She mentions he better stick and then get his reward or else he won’t get any action. Could someone tell David to lay off the carrot juice? He’s glowing…

Claire gets another call from Casey the depressed woman from her counselling line. Does Claire know anything about healthy boundaries? I am quite sure that it is against policy for Casey to call her on her mobile. Soon she will be moving into an extra room at the house which seems fairly strange and dangerous.

We have just started the holiday season and we are all getting set to eat, drink and vomit our way through the festivities. But, let’s be honest, the most exciting part of the season – for those of us older than 14 – is New Years Eve. I mean, that is the question for the holiday season. I’m curious as to what you are having for Christmas dinner. I may be interested in what was under your tree. But, mainly, I really want to know what you are doing for New Years. Is it too early to ask? Nope, it’s never too early, and those of us planning to head to the Big Apple, Montreal or Manchester, better start planning now.

Due to the CBC timeline our friends in Weatherfield celebrated new years 2007 about six hours ago. It will be MONTHS until we see what they do to ring in 2008. So, with that in mind, I am wondering which household the Corrie Canuksters would like to spend the big night with.

Let’s have a little poll. Chose your party from the list below and send me your choices. I will post the results and the fun comments.

The Battersby-Browns

The meal: cigarettes, lager, mince pies and Chinese takeaway.

To be honest, just add a martini and that is my kind of New Years meal. At this party, there would be Les, Cilla, Chezney, Fizz Bomb Brown, our Kirkey, Leanne and Yanna. Does that say “party” to you?

The Grimshaws

The meal: Lager, red wine, Indian takeaway, endless bags of crisps and chocolate bars from the corner shop.

Now I know most of us would rush to go party with Eileen and Sean, but you have to know that Violet will also be there. I like Violet but she seems to have the market on misery cornered. If she were to crack a smile, perhaps it would be better. Also, Jason – the party totty – would most likely be spending half his time there and the other half at the Platt’s. Jamie would probably be there too. But, I don’t know that he’d be the best party animal. Is Eileen and Sean enough? You be the judge.

The Platts

The meal: White wine, pizza, the last of the Christmas left-overs, Frescos pudding.

Now, this may be a nightmare, as you’d have to look at Gail all night and Bethany would terrify you. Will she choose this year to pee on the carpet? But, Bethany will probably retire to the dishwasher at 7:30 and Gail will most likely get drunk. Also, David being a wild card may do something very dramatic which would make your attendance worth it. Audrey may also kick it up a notch and bring two married boyfriends.

The Websters

The meal: White wine, lager, burned beef Wellington replaced by fish and chips from the chippy.

You would most likely end up watching movies on the couch. It could be the ultimate in low key, relaxed new years. You could make fun of Sally with Rosie and Sophie while Kevin keeps things light. Once the girls go to bed after midnight, you can sit around talking about how fortunate Sally and Kevin are and pretend that Sally isn’t prone to sleeping around and social climbing.

The House of Bishop

The meal: tea, midget gems, mince pies, tea biscuits, sherry, tuna sandwiches with the crusts cut off, cucumber sandwiches if they get really crazy, gin for Rita.

OK, on first glance you are thinking PASS!!! I know that the last thing I want to do in New Years in listen to Emily reminisce about the time she and Earnest spent new years watching the Queens address with some cookies and the blanket be bought her on a trip to Wales, but it may be good. Rita would get hammered, maybe she will bring new-found-old-pal Doreen with her. This could be the dark-horse New Years jam!

The McDonalds

The meal: left over hot pot, vodka, lager, cigarettes.

Liz and her breasts would be there. Nuf said.

The Peacocks

The meal: pork loin roast, new potatoes, fresh carrots and broccoli, home made apple pie from scratch with cream, cookies for later, white wine, tea

There is no way to dress this up. It will be a snore. Party gods help the poor soul who has to ring in the new year at this quilting bee of a celebration. The meal will most likely be fantastic, that you can count on. But then once Claire starts talking about crochet patterns you’ll be asking ‘how did it come to this?’

The Duckworths

The meal: lager, full English breakfast, dessert made by Molly.

Join Molly, Tyrone, Vera and Jack for dinner in their parlor. To follow, Jack will go outside to sit with his pigeons, Vera will go yell at Jack. Jack will come back inside to give you some words of wisdom. Vera will cal him an idiot. Molly will try to make them behave. Basically, get ready to laugh your head off.

The Barlows

The meal: Red wine – lots of it. Cigarettes, bitterness pie and sour cream.

Thankfully, Blanche will be there. Now, I don’t want to post any spoilers, so Tracy may, or may not be there. Since Amy is hideous, everyone can talk about what a shame it is that she didn’t get tweezers from Santa (he doesn’t deliver to dishwashers). Perhaps, if you fancy it, you could get drunk and make out with Adam, or Peter if he’s there too.

The Connors

The Meal: brought in from The Italian (or maybe Sonny will cook), red wine, white wine, vodka

Who cares, what happens? Just get Liam naked, or Michelle if you fancy it. Carla can tell you about the time she lost the role of Seabisquit to Hillary Swank, who eventually lost the role to an actual horse. It could be good. We know it will be posh.

So, those are your choices. Tell me how you like to party. In the comments section, I will make the first comment and choose all follow up comments to be emailed to me. This should be fun.

OK, I have a better idea, send me an email to dabrewstATyahoo.com (in the real email format) and I will deal with the responses that way. I can’t get the blog to work like I want for this.

Last night on Vison TV, I caught a show called ‘Dinner Ladies’ a Brit-com about a canteen set in a factory.

Who stars in this show? 3 Corrie faces!

Thelma Barlow – aka Mavis
Shobna Gulati – Sunita
Robet Dunn – the gent who plays ‘Roger’, Janice’s new plumber beau

Add to this the goddess Julie Walters, who is brilliant on it.

I think it was on at 8:30, so well worth catching if you can.

Little Help
I volunteer for Out of the Cold, a shelter program in Toronto.

Each year they try to get Christmas packages together for all the guests and one of the items that are very much appreciated are wee soups, shampoos, lotions, etc. The kind of things you pick up at hotels.

I’m wondering if anyone who is coming to the pub night in Toronto can look around and see if they have any unopened bottles, etc around their house to consider donating them. I just went through my bathroom last night and found about a million (some from Paris no less!).

The small size makes them very easy for transporting and I hear that especially with the lady guests they are very popular.

I’m at the shelter on Thursday night and can drop them off then. Many thanks in advance

It’s 7:00am at Michelle’s flat and Sonny has dropped by to propose properly with a big, fat blood diamond and everything. Michelle says “yes” and Sonny is off to another one of his mobile phone meetings where they are to discuss acquiring this season’s most grating ringtones.

Michelle asks Ryan if he approves and he does, if only he can live in Sonny’s big ass house. Later she tells the rest of her family and sister-in-law Carla “Margaret Thatcher” Connor approves of the big rock so you just know it was dear. Paul wants to take everyone out to a big swanky restaurant but Michelle declines, saying she has to work, as does Sonny. Paul reminds her that she just bought her meal ticket and will likely need never work again and yet Michelle doesn’t want to let her co-workers down.

At the Rovers, Steve, Liz, Vernon, and Liz’s breasts are having breakfast and discussing the previous evening’s events and Steve declaration that Sonny is “GAY! GAY WITH SEAN!”

Vern, a veteran of the entertainment industry, reckons his gaydar is finely tuned and does not think Sonny dances with his hands above his head. Vernon probably also doesn’t know about Freddie Mercury.

Meanwhile out in the street, Sean, having learned from Jamie that Steve’s been yapping in the Rovers, has called Sonny and asks him to come round at once as it’s an emergency.

At the Rovers, Steve is still calling Sonny “GAY! GAY WITH SEAN!” Meanwhile, Sean has called in sick which suddenly makes Michelle begin to consider what Steve is saying. However to be accurate, Steve should be saying, “SONNY’S BI! BI WITH MICHELLE AND SEAN!”

At Eileen’s, Sean and Sonny are talking and Sonny makes it clear that he’s with Michelle now and their affair cannot continue (although he’s a bit cagey and seems to leave the door open for a bit on the side). Suddenly, Michelle’s at the door and Sonny runs out the back.

Steve stands outside the Rovers and smugs wildly while Michelle goes into Eileen’s. She asks Sean if it’s true what Steve said. Sean denies that he and Sonny have sex on each other and says that it’s Michelle that Sonny wants. Michelle says Steve is just bitter and twisted and will die a lonely old man. Sean, suddenly seeing that conversation isn’t ALL! ABOUT! HIM! says “him and me, both.”

Michelle assures him that someday his prince will come.

Back at the Rovers, Vernon is comparing men kissing to a car crash: you want to look but you know you should look away so when he sees two men kissing, he thinks of a car crash so he’ll look away.

“You talk a lot of rubbish,” says Steve. Indeed, when I think of a car crash, I think of Liz and Vernon rolling around all over each other.

She goes back into the Rovers and tells Steve that she can’t believe she almost believed what he said. Then Sonny comes in and asks Steve just what has he been saying about him and does he care to repeat them. Steve backs down and tells Michelle if she wants to ruin her life, it’s not his business.

The Paul and Liam come in and start interrogating Sonny for a few minutes and he looks panicked until they reveal that they’re just winding him up. They do tell him that since Ryan’s father died, Liam and Paul have been father figures to him and tell him that the duty now falls to Sonny and they ask they he not let them down.

Sonny agrees and everyone, including Michelle, sit down for a champagne toast.

This photo implies nothing untoward about Sonny and Michelle’s engagement.

Leanne’s Loaded

Leanne, back from mat leave Spain, is at Jamie’s and has offered to cook him a meal to thank him for letting her stay over last night.

She also drops in on Less, who gives her a welcome home hug, and remarks that she’s lost weight (“about 9 lbs worth,” says the missus). He gets her caught up on the latest happenings: the house has been redecorated, they got a new leather sofa, and Tracy Barlow murdered Charlie Stubbs. He offers to let her stay with them but she observes that it’s already crowded and insists on staying at a hotel. Her job in Spain, selling apartments, has made her flush with cash and she gets special rates at hotels.

She later reiterates this to Jamie who tries to get her to stay at his place. It’s just as well, however, because he says that the landlord called and announced that he’s selling the house and Jamie will have to find a new place. I thought Blanche still owned this place but I guess I missed something when she sold it.

Weakness for Wyborowa

Jacqueline Rita had one too many vodkas last night. She decides she’s been spending too many nights with Doreen and neglecting her boring old friends which one does when one’s liver hurts.

Also…

Claire’s still way too personally involved with Casey, the woman in crisis.

From my sources at the CBC:

BC/Pacific Time only:

Sunday, December 9, 2007
Due to live coverage of Raptors basketball, Coronation Street will be
seen at 7:00 am on Sunday in BC.
There will be a crawl running this Sunday to notify viewers

Sunday December 16 2007
Coronation Street will be airing from 7:00 am – 9:30 am due to curling
coverage.

FOR ALL REGIONS:

Wednesday December 19 2007
Coronation Street is preempted on Wednesday December 19 2007 due to
holiday programming
There will be two episodes of Coronation Street on Thursday December 20
2007 from 7:00 pm – 8:00 pm

I just got off the phone with Fionne Macools and they have a reservation for us under the name Jacqueline for 7 pm on Dec 4 (next Tuesday).

AND they are willing to accomodate us with seperate bills….so I am very well pleased.

489 King Street West, (King and Spadina)
Phone: (416) 586-1331

I have us down for 10 people for dinner and drinks, as I think we all tend to eat dinner at the Corrie pub nights. If you are coming and haven’t told me so, let me know so I can update them.

Note to Pantagruelle: If you are in Toronto that night, your drinks and pierogis are on me.

I’ll also be doing a Corrie Christmas theme trivia, so study up!

Mrs. Wilcox and I will be going out shopping this weekend so I thought I’d take the scientific approach and make a list of gifts for my friends on the street.

(One of Glacia’s favorite movies/books and CERTAINLY one of her favorite scenes)

For Jamie, A Volleyball

Claire receives a call for a pick up at the train station, unfortunately the train goes into a tunnel before all the details can be taken. Steve says it’s best to just ignore the call because it’s unlikely that the caller will still be at the station by the time a minicab gets there. Jamie overhears and offers to go out to pick of the fare himself, ignoring Steve’s warning.

Well thank God he did – otherwise he might miss the opportunity to spend 15 minutes driving his ex-girlfriend who slept with his dad, triggering the rather Shakespearean events that befell the Baldwins.

Yes, Leanne is back in town with a sassy new hairdo and no longer sporting a tea towel or Guernsey cow in front of her. She does look fabulous I must say.

She’s hesitant to get in the car but Jamie tells her it’s okay and they have a chinwag on the way back to Weatherfield. Turns out, she didn’t know that Janice is in France (Glacia sighs and genuflects) with the plumber.

Leanne says she’s going to get a hotel, but before she goes off looking for a place, she asks Jamie to tell her all the details about Frankie and him. He gets a bottle of plonk and they talk at his place. He explains that while he doesn’t forgive her, he’s just exhausted from hating all the time and he’s trying to let everything go.

They talk about Danny and Frankie, etc and he ends up offering her a bed at his place instead of the hotel. He says that he only got himself in the house and that soon he might start talking to a football. (What? Okay, like Corrie Canuckers have been suggesting, why didn’t Sean move into his place? I guess because then there’d be no room for the wicked ex-girlfriend.)

Leanne agrees and tells him to go get another bottle of wine and when he leaves she does that smirky thing that I kind of hate.

For Kelly, A Polish/English Dictionary
Cause looks like she might have only one mate soon.

The Connors hire a new machinist, the lovely Vicky all the way from Warsaw, and not Walsall in Birmingham as Fizz thinks. Vicky gets settle in and after introductions she gives a big, ‘Hey girlfriend!’ to Kelly – at which point the gals know that Vicky has come in from the evening shift.

Sally, Jo and Fizz try to find out how much she is earning and corner her outside of the bathroom. Liam sees this and accuses them of trying to bully her out of her conkers and lunch money. They explain that they are worried that she is making less than minimum wage and he tells them that it’s none of their business and that their own wages haven’t been affected. True, they agree, but for how long and what happens if htey want a raise or if one of them is made redundant. Liam tells them to get back to work.

Kelly, meanwhile, is getting a lot of flack about working the cheap night shift. She is unable to live with the guilt and tells Karla that she can’t do the late shift anymore.

Karla yells and says that everything in British industry was okay until that bloody Charles Dickens came about with his stories ripe with class inequality and social injustice.

Okay, maybe she didn’t say that, maybe it was more along the lines of, ‘Oh bugger.’

For Sonny, A Crates and Barrel Gift Certificate
In case he has to make any more stand-in jewellery purchases.

Michelle is getting ready for her BIG date with Sonny to a fancy restaurant. There’s been all kinds of guessing as to why the big occasion and while Liz feels that Sonny is going to propose, Steve feels that he’s going to dump her.

She is looking all extra shiny when she appears at the restaurant in what appears to be a nightgown. (Oh, that’s what the kids are wearing a dresses these days…yes.) Regardless, she looks fab and Sonny is well pleased.

He asks her if anything is wrong and she just says that she’s not used to fancy schmancy high falootin’ restaurants and he tells her not to worry because she’s the best looking woman there. (I don’t doubt!).

She’s still looking a bit stressed and he finally gets her to admit why and she tells him that she thought maybe he invited her out to take their relationship to the next level with her moving in with him. He seems surprised and she beats herself up for even saying anything.

He responds, ‘If I seem surprised it’s just that I’m shocked that you think I’m that brave. That I would take that risk even though that’s what I want.’

Okay, I’ll stop right there and say that for me HANDS DOWN that’s the smoothest line of the year on Corrie. I was transfixed the minute he said ‘that you think I’m that brave.’. Omg…he’s like butter!

Then doesn’t he get down on his knee and propose using A NAPKIN RING HOLDER as a stand in ring…which just popped my harlequin romance fantasy bubble. I think it would have been better to just propose without the ring…surely she knows he’s good for it.

Of course Michelle says,’Yes’ and they scurry home to tell all the good news. She hangs on to the napkin ring holder with loving admiration and I have to wonder, ‘Did the restaurant add it to the bill?’

Michelle tells him she can’t wait to tell Sean because ‘Won’t his face be a picture?’

Oh wait, I know that picture!

Yes, Sean is surprised but does a very lovely job of being happy for her. He even offers to get be the pageboy in a sailor’s suit. (I could look for an image, but frankly, it was just far too easy.)

When Steve hears of the engagement, he explodes and tells her that Sonny is gay and he is gay with Sean.

There’s an interesting reaction from Michelle as she tells him off about spreading rumours about Sonny and her best mate Sean (is there anyone on the show who DOESN’T consider Sean their best mate?), we can see there’s that glimpse of ‘oh dammit’ in her face. Like she believes what he’s saying but just doesn’t want to admit it.

I wonder why? Did she pick up on some chemistry between Sean and Sonny? Is she doing the math on Sean’s mood swings? Or did she find Sonny’s ‘Big Busty Sean’ magazines under his bathroom sink.

Finally, For Liz

Because my love, Lycra and middle age ponch should never be in the same room together.

I know that there’s been discussion about the fate of the puppets from Friendly Giant and I’m sure our Ang can give us more details, but I just wanted to let know that they are safe and back in the hands of the late Bob Homme’s (aka Friendly Giant) family.

What I glean from the Globe and Mail is that the CBC had them in their museum but used them for a Gemini Awards skit without the family’s permission. This was apparantly ‘the last straw’ for the family. The puppets were on loan to the CBC Museum, and the family has decided to remove Friendly Giant props from the museum.

This has falls under the title of “Media Mea Culpa’ for the Globe and Mail.

However, until it’s pulled from Youtube, we can still enjoy our favorite musical cats (giraffe and Rooster).

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CGvMV-CjkD0&rel=1">

It’s been a looooooooooong time since I curled by the fire with a chair big enough for two, but I still have fond memories.

On a side note, when I clicked on the first youtube, a related link was the ‘Tootie’s Bong’ episode from ‘Facts of Life’.

I submit my vote for the Stephen Reid role…appropriate accent attached.

BTW – I hope Fat Brenda is Canadian because I just can’t master the Manchurian accent.