Around 7:15 last night I got a call from Debbie.

 

Debbie:  ‘Dude, who’s doing the update for tonight?’

 

Glacia: ‘Dude, me.  Why?’

 

Deborah: ‘Dude, there HAS to be a Falling Down refence.’

 

Glacia: ‘What like the movie?’

 

Deborah: ‘Totally.’

 

Glacia: ‘Duuuuuuuuuuuuuude. Sweeeeeeeeeeet.’

 

Deborah: ‘Duuuuude’.***

 

So not having seen the episode yet, I was worried.  Who had the breakdown, Roy, Tyrone or Bethany? 

 

***This is exactly how Debbie and I speak to each other.

 

In Which Roy Leaves His Padded Cell

Haley and Becky get off the bus, but Haley won’t go home to change.  When Becky tells Roy that Haley has gone straight to work and that he needs to go talk to her, he says he can’t that he needs to finish his work….then the mop and pail tip over and that is surely a bad sign.

 

Things get worse when Roy’s local supplier can’t bring milk or eggs until the next day.   Roy refuses to go to Dev’s to get eggs and milk because they’re not local produced.

 

Becky tells him that he has to go to Tescos – I mean FRESHCO, Freshsco.  Roy immediately starts going into a panic, ‘What’s an egg?  What do they look like?’.  Okay, it’s not that bad, but he does say that  Tes-er-Freshco is too big and that he might not be able to find the eggs and milk there. 

 

Oh dear.

 

Becky convinces him that he’ll be okay and gives him her mobile just in case she needs something else while he’s there.  Roy says that he doesn’t know how to operate a mobile, but Becky once again calms him and he is able to operate the floor all the way to the front of the café.  More success is found when he operates the door correctly, all the way muttering, ‘Milk and eggs, milk and eggs.’

 

Really, Becky should have gone instead, but Blanche says she doesn’t want to be left alone with Roy when he’s all ‘Rainman’ ‘n shit.

 

At Freshco’s Roy is sulking around the saran wrapped pile of milk in the middle of the aisle.   Michelle runs into him and tells him there’s milk in the fridge but he says the aisle milk is fresher.  (Now, I haven’t had a glass of milk in 25 years, but I seem to remember that milk needs to be kept cold….).   Michelle inquires about Haley, but Roy is more concerned about the excess packaging of the aisle milk.

 

Next we see him rummaging through the eggs looking for free range local eggs, and when a clerk coms to help Roy tells him he wants local eggs, preferably within walking distance.  So basically Roy wants eggs that were produced by Deidre.  While the clerk tries to help him, his mobile phone goes off and he needs the clerk to help him answer it.

 

Haley is calling him to remind him to come back.  Blanche tells her that he might not make it back.   The café is his padded cell and he leaves it at his own peril.

 

Back at Freshco’s things go from bad to worse.  Roy starts explaining that if the eggs were fresh, you wouldn’t need packaging (What?  Don’t local eggs break?)  Anyway, he decides to just carry the eggs in his coat pocket, thus removing the need for wasteful cardboard packaging.   The clerk says he can’t let him do that and when he tries to take the egg carton away from Roy, they  fall on the floor and break. 

 

Roy proclaims that it’s all right and instructs the clerk to get him a bag (Paper!  Not plastic!) while he proceeds to empty out further cartons into his grocery cart of milk.  This is where security steps in. 

 

(Okay, call me a big ol’ canuck, but I have NEVER seen security in a grocery store.  Oh, maybe once at the Tescos – I mean Dominion – in the Annex, but then again, you can’t trust a student population.)

 

Anyway, Becky was called and she collects Haley from the factory and who rushes over to Freshcos.  Meanwhile, unlike Falling Down, this breakdown ends in Roy having a nice cup of Tetley’s in the manager’s office who explains that Freshco’s has made a commitment to less packaging and he can read about it in their mission statement.  (You know, I realize now that when I die, I’d like it to happen during a sales pitch so that the transition will be painless.)

 

Actually, the manager was pretty sweet and when Haley arrives, he explains that Roy got ‘into a state’ but there’s no lasting damage.

 

Back at home, Roy asks Haley why she came to collect him and she says that she’s not sure.  (eek!).  When he asks if she will see Christian again, she says no, that he’s lived without her this long so she doubts he needs her.   Roy says that if he got to know her, he’d need her.  (awww.)   Anyway, they talk further about Christian and their own relationship and both express concern if they can ever be happy again.

 

I would like to add that I sympathize with Roy regarding the Frescho’s fiasco, having had my own recent difficulties with organic locally grown food.

 

Update, Chapter 2, In Which Glacia Really Doesn’t Care About Other Storylines 

Sarah declares that David doesn’t exist anymore, but Gayle reminds her that he’s her brother and the Salon is Audrey’s livelihood so they’re going to have to play nice in front of the customers.  Gayle, Audrey and Sarah go to the Rovers to talk about David.  Nothing new there, Gayle thinks he needs to learn a lesson, Audrey says he’s behaving and Sarah wants to talk about her Big Fat Mancunian Wedding (Part Deux).

 

Paul is being all sneaky and Tyrone continues to be suspicious.  He looks through Paul’s manbag but doesn’t find anything and when Paul sees that it’s been riffled through, he confronts Tyrone.   Tyrone basically tells him to jump in a lake and storms off.   Leeanne then calls him to tell him she needs supplies and he takes £200 from Jack’s cigar box to pay for it.

 

Liam is taking advantage of Rosie’s schoolgirl crush to get her to work overtime and make lunch runs.   Carla, rightly so, warns him about this and reminds him of the Joanne incident.