No big surprise here but Coronation Street was feted last night at the British Soap Awards including best soap and a best actor nod for Alan “Tyronne” Halsall.

Congrats to all.

No big surprise here but Coronation Street was feted last night at the British Soap Awards including best soap and a best actor nod for Alan “Tyronne” Halsall.

Congrats to all.

You know, if Stella can't raise the cash to fix the Rovers, she could always ask Nigel Wright. Ooh, lookit me! I'm topical. #cdnpoli—
Corrie Canuck (@Corrie_Canuck) May 15, 2013

This week the Rovers reconstruction could have been featured on the television programmes of both Mike Holmes and Gail Vaz-Oxlade. The former because, if workers are doing unpaid worker, one has to wonder if they’re going to be making it right and the latter because Stella ordered several thousand pounds worth of renovations before confirming if the insurance company would pay for it. Either way, she looks primed to sit awkwardly while she takes a scolding on Slice TV.

So Gary isn’t getting paid, nor Owen’s suppliers, nor pregnant Tina who is getting closer to the due date. 

So after bouncing a big ol’ cheque to Owen that even the most generous overdraft protection would not cover, Stella scrambles to raise some money. She turns to Leanne who has a few bob in the bank the sale of her share in Barlow’s Bookies, which is funny because the last place Leanne invested in got burned down for the insurance money. Leanne agrees to “invest” in the pub (read: pay Owen) on one condition: Stella chuck Karl. But Stella won’t have it.

“Ah love ‘im!” she protests and decides to come clean to Owen about the insurance money. Owen clears the builders out but later decides to start salvaging the work he did. When he is caught by Stella and Karl, and confrontation ensues and we end the week with Owen brandishing a crowbar before Karl’s skull.

“Go on,” Karl taunts him. “Do it.”

And if you listened closely, you could hear all of Canada chanting the same thing.

Also, Eva went off on holiday with a friend in Ibiza with a little spending money from Gloria:

"A Price Always Stands her Round" is the new "A Lannister Always Pays his Debts."—
Corrie Canuck (@Corrie_Canuck) May 15, 2013

Speaking of the bookies, Carla bought Leanne’s share and brought her brother Rob in as “Restructuring Consultant” or some such job title that doesn’t sound like you don’t do much but for some reason it earns more than anyone else in the office (I am not talking about my place of work. Not at all). It also involved free coffee which really got up in Sylvia’s business.

So far, Rob’s biggest contribution is adding some more up to date TVs and a new sign in the Battlestar Galactica font.

No, seriously:

“There may yet be Brothers of Man…”

To be honest, the whole Bookies storyline left me with this one thought:

I like Carla's umbrella.—
Corrie Canuck (@Corrie_Canuck) May 15, 2013

Sylvia was given a two year old letter from her ex-husband, St. John who would like to get in touch with Roy. Roy has never described his childhood as happy so we’ll see where this all goes.

David and Kylie have learned the sex of the baby at the ultrasound (it’s a secret) but it made it all very real for every one involved, including Nick who may be the father. David is also being very supportive by taking Kylie’s shifts at the Bistro.

Paul has decided to take Eileen and Jason down to London to meet his new “son-in-law” Todd. Paul doesn’t understand how marriage works. He would be his step-son. 

Since I’m on the subject of teenage drama, let’s start with Katy, Ryan and Chesney.  Last week, convinced all was over and done between her and Ches, Katy went out drinking with Ryan and threw herself at him between rounds of vodka shots.  Because nothing says “I’m totally seriously into you” like getting hammered to forget your ex.  Love the one you’re with, I guess.  Poor Ches realized too late he had over-reacted, and when he saw Katy leaving Ryan’s in the morning (they hadn’t slept together) he knew he wouldn’t be able to stay in the relationship.  He has a new relationship, with lager.  Lager won’t dump him for a skeevy DJ.  Which is all stupid, because when Ryan tried to kiss Katy as she was headed home, she totally ducked and covered – clearly she only likes him when she’s drunk Katy, right?  I cannot see that being the basis of a healthy relationship going forward, and I think Katy knows that too.  Meanwhile, Michelle tried to talk to Ryan and Katy as though they were adults, pointing out the importance of stability in young Joseph’s life.  But Micheeeeelllllleeeee, they liiiiiiiiiiiiiike each other, and you don’t understand their plight.  Nothing’s going to keep them apart, it’s lurve. Ryan actually says to Michelle “How would you know what it is, or how I feel, so just back off.”  Which I believe I did actually hear at work last week.  All that was missing from this storyline to make it utterly cinema verité to me was a slammed locker door and some sad passive-aggressive tweets.  Sigh.  Teenagers, always with the dramatic.  But I guess this means the writers are actually writing this realistically.

In relationships that SEEMED like they should be in high school, meanwhile, Tommy still likes Tina and tried to take her out for a nice meal but Gary is totally blocking his moves.  Even though Gary is with Izzy and really should leave Tina alone. Scandale!  Gary bought Tina’s dad’s wedding ring off a pawnbroker – said it was only 20 quid but in reality it was 10 times that amount.  Anna, on finding the receipt in Gary’s laundry, told him to smarten the heck up and not to screw up what he’s got with Izzy.  Good advice.  Hope he follows it, because Izzy might be my favourite character at the moment.   Tommy tells Izzy to look to her man, because he’s tired of being blocked all the time.  Plus, I think he’s right on the mark that Gary fancies Tina – it’s just a question of where they’re going with this.  THE CORRECT ANSWER IS NOWHERE, writers.

Carla sells her flat, and takes Peter, Michelle and Steve out to the Bistro to celebrate. When they order their second bottle of expensive vino, Leanne takes offense.  How can Peter afford this wine when his (and her) business is so hard up?  Leanne decides to go back to the Bookies, but the constant fighting between she and Peter is terrible for business.  Carla, as she has a fairly decent head for business, sees this – and she buys out Leanne’s part of the business with the money from her flat.  This is a great plan except for the part where she does it behind Peter’s back.  When he realizes what Carla is done, he throws a temper tantrum worthy of my three-year-old nephew, sulking.  ”I don’t want to eat.  Can I order my own food?  You’re the boss.”  He literally kicks a can in the street at one point.  It was priceless.  Carla sneaks in to the bookies  with Rob and Tracy to see the books to check on her investment (because why do that BEFORE you buy… I thought she was meant to be good at business) and she realizes that Rob might actually have a couple of brain cells firing when it comes to the gambling business.  She installs Rob as her representative to work the day-to-day business with Peter.  Again, without telling Peter, because it went over so well last time she acted without telling him.  But that’s ok, because she uses her sexy sexy ways to bring Peter round.  That’s Peter and Carla in a nutshell, right there.

In Faye and Tim news, Faye is feeding Tim stories (which, as we have seen time and again, is what she does) and Tim is buying them.  He thinks he can leave her alone much of the time, that she can watch Bridesmaids alone, that she will be able to shift for herself for food.  He says Faye is his top priority, but he doesn’t understand what it means to parent.  Anna, seeing this, is beside herself with worry and indignation.  I genuinely think he doesn’t know how to parent.  He was absentee for so long.  But then, he also went out of his way to be a jerkface to Chesney that time in the street, so there are clearly layers of mean to Tim.  This can’t end well, is what I’m getting at.

Meanwhile, Dev was relying on Mary for stability – he even, at the kids’ request,  invited her to play Monopoly with the family.  But Mary, as ever, takes things to an extreme.  When she tells Dev in his shop that the Alahans have her full attention for the foreseeable, Dev’s response of a constipated grimace speaks volumes.  She’s mothering him, and it’s driving him mad.  But she is great with Asha and Aadi and somehow with them knows just what to say.  Who knew Mary would be so good with kids?  She’s like an onion.

And of course, after moping about pining her lost love, Eileen was told to snap out of it and chased after Paul.  Because really.  Give your head a shake, woman.  Fortunately for us at home, she waited till he was on the train to do so, leading to some fantastic footage of Eileen running along the quay after Paul’s train.  I loved how the dressers matched her blouse to the train, actually.  Kudos to Jason too for cheering her on.  So, will Eileen manage to stop Paul from leaving her life forever?

Other comments:

• Steve could drink his weight in alcohol at age 18?  Good lord man.
• Mary grabbing the Scottie dog at Monopoly.  I like the boot, myself.
• By Tuesday, I wanted Katy to go full on Kelly Taylor on Ryan and Chesney.  ”I choose… myself!”
• When Faye stole Sean’s sandwich because she hadn’t eaten, all I could think of was “won’t she be lovely in school this morning.”  Her poor teachers.

Did I miss anything?  Let me know in the comments!

The big shock revelation this week was that Chesney Brown was named after early 90′s pop idol Chesney Hawkes whose song, “The One and Only” was a big hit in 1991 and later featured in the film “Doc Hollywood” and, if you’ve seen it, ironically, “Moon.”

Beth decided that she wanted Chesney to get over Katy so she set him and her niece, Sinead Tinker, on a blind date. It was awkward but we did learn that Sinead is a soap maker and suffered nicknames at school like “Stinker,” on account of her initials. Katy sees them and jealousy ensues but Ches isn’t really into the date and they part as friends. Later he agrees to go out with Katy and but his jealousy gets the better of him when he starts reading texts from a lovelorn Ryan. Even though she chucked her job at Greco and wants no part of Ryan anymore, Ches is still accusing her of wanting him. So they broke up for good this time. I wonder if Chesney kept Sinead’s number.

Things got pretty rough at the Windasses when Faye accused Anna of hitting her. The ensuing investigation was a bit too much for Faye who dropped the accusation when she realized Anna could go to jail. But Anna decided to relent and allow Faye to stay with Tim for a while so they could get to know each other. If his chocolate milk and Nutella based breakfasts are anything to go by, I don’t think she’ll come back.

Gary is behaving increasingly odd around Tina, almost as though it’s those two who are having a baby and not Gary and Izzy with Tina providing the womb. A pre-natal class is too much for Izzy to take as she feels she’s just in their way and leaves in tears.

Dev is struggling to manage parenting Asha and Aadi so he’s put out an ad for a nanny. I don’t know if Sophie turned him down but a newly released from the Bistro Mary came on quite strong, despite zero years experience in childcare.

Eileen is looking forward to vegging in Egypt but Julie, of course, is going for the full Lara Croft experience

Carla sold her flat. Peter is considering sell the bookies. Will he buy into Underworld next?

I hope it all proves to be unfounded.

I feel for Dev with the kids asking if Mummy is in Heaven. Tonight, mine asked me what a god was. Me: "Ummmmmm…."—
Corrie Canuck (@Corrie_Canuck) April 25, 2013

This week we saw the sparsely attended memorial service of Sunita Alahan which was also, as it happens, Corrie’s first Hindu funeral.

The state of Sunita’s soul was much on everyone’s mind. Dev worried about how he would explain it to his children as the actions in this life affect the next life. If Sunita truly burned down the Rovers, what would happen to her soul? Simon Barlow, tried to commiserate with Aadi and Asha, noting that he too lost a his mother but then put his foot in it by suggesting that unlike his mum Lucy, Sunita was not likely in Heaven on account of the fact that she is believed to have burned down the Rovers.

This led to a spiritual dilemma for Dev as he had to explain to his children where Sunita fit in in a faith that holds that one’s actions in this life affect how one passes on to the next. It was an interesting week in the Alahan house as, as far as I know, Dev wasn’t particularly devout as a Hindu. Remember when Ciaran started a restaurant in an upstairs flat and Sarah-Lou was his waitress and she accidently gave Dev and Sunita steaks? That was the only time I remember them mentioning their religion, as opposed to Sophie Webster who mentions being “Chris-tee-an” every other week.

(Speaking of Websters, has there been any on screen explanation for Kevin’s absence? If there was, I may have missed it.)

The funeral, in which the Alahans were dressed in white, per Hindu tradition, was a low key and sad affair. Sunita’s family refused to come, saying she brought shame upon the family and Amber couldn’t make it. They tried for a little levity with Steve’s ill-fitting suit but really, I think the writers made a hash out of Shobna Gulati’s departure and she really deserved better than this.

In any case, Karl left us with a cliff hanger by claiming he was responsible for Sunita’s death but Stella believed he was speaking metaphorically. Yes, he metaphorically pulled out her breathing tube.

Still, Jason’s none too chuffed when he learns that Stella and Karl are indeed an item. He has a friend in Leanne, at least, who has a nose for a bad ‘un herself.

Tim has moved to the street and is growing closer to Faye, at Anna’s expense. Faye learned a little more about her background and her Welsh mother. I think this storyline could be an honest look at the complications involved in fostering children but Tim turned a little nasty with Chesney and it makes me wonder if there is more to it with this guy.

Plus it’s led to Anna playing Led Zeppelin in Roy’s Rolls and that’s just upsetting the order of the universe and the fixed points in time the Doctor’s always going on about.

Sylvia: take it from me. Children need parents who get on. Otherwise, they turn out odd—
Corrie Canuck (@Corrie_Canuck) April 25, 2013

Speaking of Chesney, no, he still hasn’t forgiven Katy.

Fizz is back at the factory.

Eileen and Paul broke up because she doesn’t want him risking his life anymore.

Sorry – meant to draft this first.

This week we said goodbye to Shobna Gulati’s portrayal of Sunita Alahan (nee Parekh). One of the bright spots in even the grimmest of storylines, the character of Sunita took a turn when she had an out of character affair with Karl Munro.

When news spread that she was coming out of her coma, Dev rushed to her side but Karl also paid her a visit so the last thing she saw was his face as he pulled her breathing tube out, killing her. The hospital thought she may have pulled it out herself. Dev is left to tell Aadi and Asha that their mother was dead. It was all very heartbreaking. And to make matters worse, the police is considering closing the investigation,  meaning that Karl is very close to getting away with it.

Oh, and Stella broke up with Jason and is back with Karl so everything’s coming up Munroe.

Tyrone paid a final visit to Kirsty in jail. She seemed sincere in wanting to break the cycle of violence,  noting that it was Ruby who finally opened her eyes. There leaves the question of whether or not Fizz and Ty are going to move in together but Fizz noted that she didn’t like leaving Chesney alone right now.

The One O’Clock Club sounds way more interesting than Probus. Stan has been self-medicating his arthritis with special “herbal” brownies. When Sylvia tries them, her own aches and pains go away and she becomes very interested in soap bubbles. She’s aghast when she learns the real secret ingredient but eventually concedes that they work in a way that aspirin doesn’t.  Then Dennis tries them for his back but when Rita figures out what’s going on, she becomes quite moralistic for a former cabaret singer and marches them to Dr. Carter who lectures them on the negative side effects of pot, which, in your 70′s can’t be that big a concern. Besides, eating it in brownie form must be more pleasant than shooting up hashish (you shoot it up, right? I, of course, have no idea).

Wearing that kimono Martha gave him, Ken forgets his wedding anniversary to Deirdre but manages to finangle a last minute anniversary party. She’s not fooled though.

Gary & Izzy are having a boy in Tina’s womb. Tina is having conflicting feelings but is too rattled by a break in at her flat to dwell on them. But Gary helps her through it so … yay Gary?

So let’s get to brass tacks, shall we?  This is going to be a long one… there was a lot of plot.

The big story this week was Tyrone and Kirsty.  The week began with Kirsty meeting up with her mum, having perjured herself on the stand to present herself as a victim.  Her mum does not approve, but sees Kirsty spiralling out of control and wants to help.  She offers to move in with Kirsty and help with baby Ruby, but Kirsty snaps – her mum will never leave her dad.  She didn’t leave her when Kirsty was nine and being beaten, and she won’t leave now.  Bye Alison, you did your best to throw a life preserver to drowning Kirsty but unfortunately it wasn’t good enough.  When Kirsty comes home, already wound, she is upset to find Sally and not Julie looking after Ruby.  Hush!  The baby’s asleep for once!  But no, Kirsty flies off the handle over Ruby having been left alone with someone who may have colluded with a kidnapper.  Sally points out Kirsty should be grateful for the help, but out she goes on her ear without so much as a thank you.  And of course Ruby starts crying again at the screaming, and no wonder.  Later, Julie comes by to check on Kirsty, but Kirsty rants and raves about not having seen her mum in months and having to come home after that stress to see Sally in her home and then throws a vase at the wall.  This is looking familiar to us, but not to Julie.  The penny drops. Julie makes some excuses “well, you’re tired, I’ll leave” etc. and gets out of there.

At the trial, Fit Doctor Wassisname Carter (he could check my blood pressure, wink wink, nudge nudge) testifies that Tyrone did come in at one point with Ruby, very concerned.  It’s not looking good for Ty, though, especially after the hatchet job his neighbors did on his character last week.  Later, Kirsty goes to see Fit Doctor Carter to get some pills to help her sleep.  Yes, please, knock yourself out so you can’t be awake for your child, that’s great parenting.  He refuses, of course, and suggests counselling instead.  Quite normal, given the situation, I should think – but Kirsty gets offended at being patronised, and storms out of the office.  The Fit Doctor stares at the door after she goes, you can see his mental wheels turning as he processes that there is something not right in her state of mind.

Tyrone takes the stand in his own defense.  He never touched Kirsty.  At first she seemed loving and caring – but then she lost her job as a policewoman, and she took her depression and anger out on him.  She hit him in the face with a ladle, and slammed him into the wall, and slammed his arm into a door which sent him to hospital.  No, he didn’t strike back.  No, he didn’t push her down the stairs.  The sticking point is why didn’t he report her behaviour to the authorities… and kudos to Alan Halsall here, who delivers a heartrending monologue about being a battered man.  He was scared, he said, of what she would do to him if she found out that he had gone to the police.  Moreover, he was ashamed to be a bloke beaten up by a woman.  People wouldn’t make jokes, though, if they knew what it was really like.  And most of all, he wanted to protect Ruby.  He stayed home and Kirsty went to work because he knew Kirsty couldn’t cope with the stress of the baby on her own.  He stayed to protect the baby: he was there to love her and look after her, because baby Ruby needed him.

At this point, I have to say, my house was terribly dusty and I had to go get a kleenex to deal with the household dust.

Dust, I say.

But then the prosecution starts asking him about Fiz.  Why didn’t he just move out instead of starting a relationship with another woman?  He was protecting Ruby, and besides, Kirsty had destroyed the caring life he thought he was going to have.  You don’t hurt the people you love.

No you don’t, agrees the lady prosecutor.  But then, you didn’t love Kirsty Soames, did you.

Meanwhile, Julie has had a thought flit through her head.  It’s an unusual sensation, so it takes her a night to process what’s occurring.  Kirsty has been lying!  She has crazy eye!  Maybe she’s been lying all along!  Maybe Tyrone is innocent!  And so, in spite of Brian’s counsel, she heads over there to confront Kirsty.  Kirsty has been having a bad day, but not as bad as Tyrone’s is Julie’s opener.  You’d drop me if you knew, counters Kirsty.  Knew what, asks Julie. That you’ve been lying all along and that you are the dastardly abuser?  THWAP! Backhand to the mouth!  Exit Julie, clutching a fat lip, beating a tactical retreat to Sean’s.  Kirsty’s gig is up.

Kirsty’s visibly lost control.  Natalie Gumede was wonderful in these scenes, trembling all over with the physical effort of maintaining any composure at all.  She puts baby Ruby into a cot in the salon, but of course the baby is picking up on her mum’s distress and is bawling her little head off.  Unable to settle herself enough to calm the child, Kirsty loses control and starts repeating “shut up” – eventually screaming it full-on into the baby’s face.

Next door, shaken Julie is feeling terrible guilt over her part in publicly condemning an innocent man.  Sean settles her down a bit, but all of a sudden there is an ominous thud and the baby stops crying.  That’s not good, I thought.  They go back next door to check, but there’s no sign of Kirsty and the baby.

Sean calls the police, and waits there while Brian and Julie go to try and stop Tyrone’s trial.  To no avail, though, because the officers of the court won’t let them in.  This actually does make sense, as much as I wanted Julie to flounce in with her cape flying, shouting dramatically to “stop the trial, this man is innocent!”  I think Julie wanted that too, some sort of redemption.  While it would have countered Kirsty’s claims that she was not violent in the least, it was not actually relevant to whether or not Tyrone hit Kirsty.  Instead, Julie has to apologize to Hayley, Tina, Tommy and Fiz, who have (as Fiz puts it) more important things to worry about than Julie’s conscience.

So the trial continues and Tina takes the stand.  The prosecution is having a field day with her total bias as a witness when all of a sudden… in come Kirsty and the baby! To the middle of the court!  ”I need help, I’m scared of what I might do!  I might hurt her, I don’t want to hurt her – she needs to be with you.”  The court is in an uproar, and the judge asks Kirsty to leave.  But she refuses.  ”He’s not the monster, I am.”  Kirsty admits all – Tyrone was telling the truth, she was the one who hit him and her testimony was all made up.  But it’s gone to trial, and there are systems in place to make sure the law is applied equally.  Consider how many abuse victims recant their stories under the stress of a trial, or under fear of reprisal.  It’s not as if the court system can sign off and say “ok, trial’s done, we were wrong, let’s sign this form.”  Fortunately, Kirsty obliges the court by providing a written confession.  It builds and builds, she says, until she cannot control it anymore.  She doesn’t want to turn into her dad, and she doesn’t want Ruby to become her.  So the judge dismisses the jury, the prosecution withdraw the charges and the defense requests an immediate dismissal.  Granted, says the judge.  Mr. Dobbs, you are found not guilty of all charges.  Tyrone is free!

Social Services even return the baby to him, granting him custody and informing him a letter will follow to that purpose.

Kirsty is taken away to a prison van in shackles, charged with perjury and perversion of the justice system.  She sees Tyrone, Fiz and baby Ruby outside the gates – a happy family, just what she tried to destroy.

Meanwhile the police are beginning to put together a case in the Rovers’ arson.  They know it’s arson now, and that someone had to use the spare keys.  ”The spare keys, you don’t say?” says Karl, obviously fondling an object in his pocket.  ”Well, excuse me, won’t you, I have to go walk the halls guiltily and plant something in Sunita’s room, completely not related to the spare keys being discussed at the moment… I mean, I’m going to go get a cuppa.”  And since he’s the conquering hero, nobody raises a question about his skulking about the halls of the hospital.  When Dev goes to talk to the doctor, Karl plants the spare key to the Rovers in Sunita’s bedside table with her personal effects.  When the police come by, Sophie is comforting Dev at his bedside vigil.  Can they look through Sunita’s stuff?  Sure, he says, but you won’t find anything because certainly nobody would have come round while she’s hooked up to a ventilator unconscious and planted incriminating evidence in her sickroom.  I mean come on, who would do that.

So Kreepy Karl seems to be winning on the diversionary tactic front.  It helps that every time Gloria opens her mouth she reinforces Karl’s lies.  To Glo, Karl can do no wrong – but she sounds like a ventriloquist’s dummy.  By Friday I started looking for his hand up her backside moving the lips.  To her credit, Stella is not sold on the convenience of Sunita as a villain.  Sunita was her friend once, and she doesn’t believe that Sunita would deliberately try to kill her.  It doesn’t make sense.  You hold on to that, Stella.

But, by the time Karl and Stella are released from hospital, Karl has weaseled his way back in to Stella’s life completely.  Jason wants to stay in and pamper his lady, but Stella sends him off.  Stella goes to see the burned shell of the Rovers and Karl comforts her, which in no way made me throw a pillow in the direction of my telly.  ”If only I could change things,” he says. “You can’t, nobody can.” she replies.  Well, he could have not lit the place on fire and shoved Sunita down the stairs into the flames.  So, yes, Stella, he could have changed things.  Anyway, back watching TV, Stella starts to have a bit of a breakdown at the losses she’s had with the Rovers burning.  So naturally Kreepy Karl sees his opportunity and leans in for a snog.  And she reciprocates.  Shades of Tony Gordon and Maria Connors, no?  But the fellow who plays Karl is doing an excellent job as a scheming baddie.

Meanwhile meanwhile, Sylvia and Stan gave us some most welcome comic relief.  Sylvia had imbibed of Stan’s brownies, which gave her significant relief for her sore wrist.  But she was unaware of their, uh, magical properties…  while doing the washing-up in the café, she was completely hypnotized by the light and colour refraction of the bubbles.  It was hilariously played.  ”It’s like rainbow land, it’s just wonderful!” Well, the gig is up when Dennis lets her in on Stan’s secret ingredient.  She is horrified!  Outraged!  Filled with uprighteous moral rectitude!  ”I have been drugged!” she says. “A member of the One-O’Clock Club!”  She continues to be quite put out, until the cutest lil’ dealer of all time, Stan, points out that many members of the One-O’Clock Club are using the same “herbal” remedy.  Imagine, the One-O’Clock Club a den of narcotics.  Blanche would roll over in her grave.  Roll over so she could hear better, that is.

So, Stan brings Sylvia a tupperware container of brownies at the Café to get her through till Monday’s club meeting.  But Anna, seeing brownies and being a practical sort, puts them out for sale.  Rita has bought three!  One for herself, one for Norris, and one for Mary, a treat to go with their tea at the Kabin.  Oh Rita.  What will Dennis say?

The various and the sundry:

• Chesney’s having a rough time of it after the breakup with Katy.  He still loves her.  Kirk is doing his best to keep his spirits up, but Ches is hitting the lager a bit hard.  So hard that he tries to chat up Eva.  That goes about as well as you would expect.
• Beth starts to give Kirk the gears for spending so much time with Chesney, until he tells her that if it was Kirk that needed a friend that Chesney would be there without question.  Chesney is his best friend and he needs a mate and that’s that.
• Izzy is as ever a woman of good sense.  In this case, she advises Gary that he needs to back off trying to tell Tina she can’t testify in Ty’s defense.  Tina might be carrying their baby, but she’s her own person and that’s that.  After Ty’s verdict, Gary takes Tina over to the Bistro to provide a sympathetic ear… and I have some thoughts.  It’s not like Tina has a lot of friends to share sympathy with.  So that had better be all that was, was a bit of sympathy from a friend, with Gary trying to make up for having been over the top in trying to control her actions before.  If the writers are trying to put together Gary and Tina I am not going to be well pleased.
• Nice that Lloyd and Mandy are giving Dev some support. Dev is absolutely shattered by Sunita’s illness and the fact that the keys were found in her possession.  It’s like he doesn’t know her at all, he thinks… and it’s Easter and he doesn’t have any Easter eggs, and he just wants everything to be normal.  Poor fellow.
• Sophie had a nice explanation this week of why she’s so upset by Sunita being so ill – when Kevin had the affair with Molly and all that mess, and when she came out and found she was in love with Sian, Sunita was always a comforting presence to her.  I can see why Sophie would be so upset by Sunita in hospital, and I’m glad the writers have remembered it too.
• Tyrone at home hoovering, when baby Ruby starts fussing.  He picks her up and immediately it stops.  Oh that was it!  She was a daddy’s girl, all along.
• Eileen and Julie have some grovelling to do, and oh do they know it.
• The costumers had Julie in some sort of large woolen cape this week.  I know she’s pregnant, and is not meant to be preggo on the show, but seriously, that cape did NOT do her any favours.  It looked like she had run out of the hairdresser’s.
• Eileen wants Paul to go for counselling after losing his friend Toni in the fire, but he seems fine (outwardly, anyway).
• Tina, Fiz and Kirk are worried about Tyrone not leaving the house, and they basically get Tommy to bully him into going out.  The man has just gotten out of prison!  How’s about you all back off and let him bond with his daughter in peace for a week.  Her schedule has been completely upset and so has his, let them get back into a semblance of routine before you start pushing them into socializing.  No matter how nice the surprise party was, I think that crowd could have been more respectful of what he’s just gone through.

Did I miss anything?  Let me know in the comments!

Here you go: http://youtu.be/Y47G-Wa4qfs

(I don’t know how to embed them cause I’m not cool like that)

Also apologies as it’s cheerleading season and I missed the Thursday night show, and didn’t have a chance to get it on the omnibus edition because I had to take the cheerleading pictures into work for the yearbook deadline… and I don’t have a PVR.  Dad filled me in on Thursday’s show though.

Let’s start with the fire, shall we?  So last week ended on the cliffhanger with Karl having started the CG flames in the Rovers’ basement, only to be discovered by Sunita.  Naturally, Kreepy Karl and Sunita argue, during which he pushes her down the stairs and then runs away.  Back to the Full Monty at the Bistro, and when he comes in Paul gives him the side-eye.  Did Paul smell accelerant or smoke on Karl?  We don’t know, because just as the lads are about to doff their kit Norris runs into the Bistro to announce that the Rovers is on Fire.  He and Emily had discovered the flames, and had gotten Tracy (who went back in for poor Eccles) out of the Barlows’.  So everyone runs down the street to see the fire… and Stella appears in the window! 

Now, I don’t know what kind of bath Stella was taking, but I don’t think I would be so relaxed that I didn’t hear fire alarms or smell smoke.  She did have candles and music, I admit.  But still.  REALLY?

My Dad also questioned the strength of her window.  Did they rebuild the Rovers with shatterproof glass after the last fire? 

Anyway, so Karl goes in to rescue her of course, but cannot break the window so is determined to die at her side.  Again, Kreepy Karl, pins Stella to the floor and whispers sweet nothings in her ear about their inevitable demise. 

Meanwhile, out in the street everyone is flipping out at the firefighters, Toni and Paul – who have no equipment and no backup.  After Gloria accuses Paul of wilfully letting her daughter die (and after they find a ladder) he and Toni go in after Stella, and then Karl.  Toni gets Karl out, but the floor collapses from the fire.  Toni!  We hardly knew you, and yet you were awesome.

Meanwhile, Sunita has managed to regain consciousness and drag herself into the pub… where she is found by the emergency crews on their arrival and evacuated.  She is unconscious in hospital with Dev mooning at her side.

After the fire, Paul’s got survivor’s guilt at Toni’s death… or is it more?  John and I are split on that.  Eileen, meanwhile, is freaking out because apparently she never realized what a firefighter actually does for a living.  Seriously, Eileen, what did you think it was?  Getting kittens out of large trees?

Karl is now the hero of the day, with everyone coming around to thank him for saving Stella’s life.  Except for Jason, who points out that Karl is sneaky and sly, and probably set the fire in the first place.  Hm, ya think?  Meanwhile, the investigators (while first thinking it was the electrial box) have determined it was arson, and they like Sunita as a suspect.  Nobody knows why Sunita was in the Rovers, after all… 

In other news, Katy brought baby Joseph around for a visit with Chesney, and it was only mildly awkward.

Meanwhile, Kirsty is starting to crack under the pressure of taking care of baby Ruby.  I dunno, Kirsty, maybe if you could calm yourself down a bit the baby wouldn’t cry all the time.  But she needs a break and calls Julie – who takes the bawling baby overnight when Kirsty lies about having to take her Mum to hospital.  Tina sees Kirsty peering through the curtains at the fire though…  but when she goes to confront Kirsty about her lie, she gets her back up.  Kirsty later tries to pawn the baby off on Eileen, but is unsuccessful.  Oh no! She’ll have to look after her own baby herself!  

And because one big storyline isn’t enough for the week, Tyrone’s trial started.  Free Tyrone!  But it’s not going so well.  Deirdre sells him down the river, and then Kirsty takes the stand and lies about various incidents of abuse in order to make it appear that she was the one abused in those situations.  Tyrone is quite upset, of course.  Fiz and Tina confronted Kirsty and her Mum outside the courthouse about her blatant and egregious lies, to which Kirsty laughed in their faces and twirled her mustache.

Really, Fiz ought to just keep out of it.  Every time Kirsty starts to crack, Fiz sticks her nose in and Kirsty gets her back up.  Do you think Kirsty would have gone this far if she wasn’t determined to stick it to Fiz as much as to Tyrone?  I’m not so sure…

So next week we’ll see more of Tyrone’s trial (#freetyrone) and more of the man of the hour, Karl.  What lengths will he go to to protect his freedom?