The Crying Olympic judges (Glacia) have made their decision and hand out the following medals:
Gold – Karla
Silver – Liam
Bronze – Ryan’s detached posturing
Michelle’s crying unfortunately did not qualify. She almost had it at the hospital, but unfortunately lost points for the blubbering on the street with Ryan.
Pop Goes the Weasel
The big story of the show is Paul’s condition and we see Liam and Karla comforting each other in the waiting room vis-à-vis the truth about Paul and Leanne. At some point the doctor comes in and tells them that they worked on Paul all night, that he’s alive but that basically he’s on his way out and they need to call all the relatives in.
Over at the Rovers, Steve tells Michelle the bad news and she reacts by saying basically, ‘Pfff, too bad, but what are you going to do.’. Steve asks if she’s not planning to go see him, but she says screw that noise, she was through with him months ago and that if she went now while he was dying, she’d just be a hypocrite.
Steve, in a stunningly Catholic guilt inducing speech that would put most priests and my grandmother to shame says, ‘If you can’t find it in your heart to forgive him, no matter what he’s done, then you’re not the woman I thought you were. The clock is ticking and when it stops you won’t be able to change your mind.’
At this point, my knee-jerk Catholicism causes me to grab my parka and start calling a cab for the hospital, but quickly realize that the speech was directed at a fictional character in a soap opera aired back in 1992, not me.
Back over to the hospickle, Liam and Karla are saying their goodbyes to Paul. Leanne, decides this might be a good time to see how Paul is doing. But surprisingly, neither Liam nor Karla want her in the room and Liam tells her to take a hike.
By the time Michelle and Steve get to the hospital, Paul has cast off his mortal coil. A group hug between Liam, Karla and Michelle ensue with Michelle berating herself for not getting their sooner. Liam wonders why the doctors couldn’t save him seeing as he was so fit and young. Karla explains that fit and young is no match for smashing into a lorry, drunk and going 70 mph. She then does a lovely Courtney Love and starts screaming at Paul at how stupid, stupid, stupid he is.
At some point during this scene, a nurse comes in and pulls the sheet over Paul’s face. Now, am I the only one who thought this was tad insensitive while the family is in the room? I was half expecting the nurse to say, ‘That’s all folks!’.
Back on the street, Liam tells the factory girls about Paul’s death and closes shop for the rest of the day. Michelle tells Ryan the bad news and tells Karla to stay with her and Ryan for the night as they all need each other.
Oh, So It Did All End In Tears!
Leanne is back at Janice’s flat crying about the fact that Liam doesn’t fancy her anymore. Janice is kind of doing the ‘I told you so.’ schtick. Leanne puts the blame on this mess where it rightfully belongs…Karla and her big god damn mouth.
Let’s see, what have the last 48 hours been like for Karla. She finds out that her husband has been hiring hookers for the last three years and that one of those hookers was her brother-in-law’s girlfriend and her potential business partner. Then she is called to the hospital to watch the same husband die of traffic injuries that he sustained driving drunk while kidnapping the hooker girlfriend. She’s being alienated from the family she needs the most at that point, who are all wondering why oh why Paul had Leanne in the boot of his car. So, selfish bitch that she is, she tells all about the Leanne/Paul connection. What an asshole.
Leanne tells Janice that she’s worried now that the Connors will close ranks against her. Oh shut up with that crazy talk! The Connors closing ranks? What have you been smoking?
Leanne approaches Liam on the street to offer up an explanation but he doesn’t want to hear it. The only thing he wants to know is if she ever slept with both Paul and him on the same night. (oooooh, SNAP!).
Somehow she does get access to his place and while they are sitting in the living room she explains that she was in a very bad emotional place when she started selling her body for sex and that she felt worthless. She tells him that is why she put off dating him when she came back on the street, but now she has changed.
Liam says that she conned him and she’s not the person he fell in love with. He adds that he never would have dated her if he knew the truth. She tries to convince him that she would never have slept with his brother. (Kind of how she would never sleep with her boyfriend’s father?)
And with that, he grabs her by the arm and tosses her out on the street. As an added bonus, he starts yelling for the whole world to hear how she is nothing but a hooker.
Kelly, has just turned the corner when this happens and hears all. After Liam storms off, Leanne raises her head to see Kelly all, ‘HA-HA!’.
Oooh, I seem to remember Leanne looking her nose down at Kelly once or twice in the past. So I think it’s all coming to bite her in the ass. Another interesting point, WHAT will Jamie’s reaction be to all this.
Gayle is hounding David about his exams and he assures her that it’s all taken care of. Later, talking to Amber, we discover that he’s skipped all his exams except for biology, which he apparantly digs. Amber tells him he’s an idiot for skipping exams and he replies that ‘the education system is stupid and it’s all about putting people into boxes.’ (This is teen code for, ‘I spent the week watching ‘South Park’ instead of studying’.)
After the exams, Gayle asks him how it went and he says it was easy-peasy lemon squeezy. She says that no matter what the results we know he’s tried his best. David is terribly offended by this remark, taking it to mean that his mom thinks he’s stupid and an aspiring drop out. He tells her that he LOVES biology and that if she thinks he’s such a dumbass he’ll quit school anyway. See mom, you’ve made me throw away my career as the next great biologist.
Later, he apologizes to her and tells her that he did skip all his exams. ‘cepting biology, of course.
In Other News
Betty says, Violet is a nice girl and that sean could do worse. He tells her that Violet is out of her league. Are they suggesting that Betty STILL doesn’t know that Sean is gay? Gay, gay, gay, gay I say!
Kayley tells that other Morton girl (sorry, brain fart here), that in order to be a cop, there has to be a police check done of the whole family….including Grandpa Kray and his well dodgy past
Eileen and Jerry set out to clean the Peacock’s house and indulge in some playful slap and tickle.
Kend admires Denise’s expensive sound system – the one bought by Brian (her brother-in-law/lover that she left Ken for.) While the two of refer to it as a record player and a hi-fi, Ken puts on some classical…the natural enemy of 12 year old boys (as indicated by Daniel’s face). Denise asks Ken about his plans. Ken tells her that he’s tried put the marriage back together but it doesn’t work. Denise tells Ken he can stay at the flat as long as he wants. Daniel shakes his head…NOOOOOOO.