Update- Friday, March 7, 2008- The I am Glad Nothing Major Happened Update


Due to problems with my VCR, I was unable to watch the episode last night. So, this update is brought to you by the letter “D”, the number “3” and Corrie.net.

 What he Really Needs is an Exorcism

The scene opens with the fire having been luckily put out by the somewhat hysterical teacher. David saunters off, smirk intact. The teacher tries calling him back, to no avail, and Amber sas “What the hell just happened?”

Back at the Platts’, Bethany is having her birthday party. Gail and Sarah make the food, and Jason entertains the children. David comes in and tells them all that he did the exam and did well.

Later on, Bethany is blowing out the candles on her birthday cake, when the doorbell rings. Bill answers the door, and it is the headmaster at the door. Apparently, it is very important, and cannot wait while the partiers sing another verse of “Happy birthday”. When the headmaster comes in, Gail assumes that David did not, in fact, write the exam. The headmaster sets her straight.

While the children turn Jason into a drag queen, the adults discuss how to solve a problem like David. He is slouched in the chair, being, well, David. Gail is angry and being Gail. The headmaster knows no longer what to do, and so has brought over a “behaviour contract”. It states that if David doesn’t abide by the rules he’ll be expelled and won’t be able to do anymore exams. Seeing as I missed this, perhaps someone can explain how this “contract” can possibly affect David’s behaviour. Audrey assures the headmaster that he will get the contract the first thing in the morning.

After the party, Gail tries to get David to sign, but he won’t, declaring it an infringement upon his human rights. Gail is near tears, I imagine her non-chin all atremble, and she tells him that she is ready to wash her hands of him. David knows his mum, and says, “You can’t, love is a bitch like that.”

Meanwhile, the great debate begins about what to do with David. Audrey pines for the days of the National Service, as putting a gun in David’s hand would really be the best solution. Bill thinks he needs a talking-to from him. Gail admits she doesn’t know what to do. Sarah suggests they just drink their problems away, and Jason says that they should all just lay off: “The harder you push him, the harder he’ll push back.”

The take up Sarah’s idea, and go to the Rover’s. Gail tells Jason she appreciates what he has done for Bethany. She says that maybe, just maybe, Jason should move in, but only if he promises to keep an eye on David, as David needs a “positive male influence.” My advice: run, run the other way as fast as you can, Jason.

Star Crossed Lovers

Fizz gears up to tell Kirk about John, but Kirk is so happy, singing Meatloaf while serving the same, that she chickens out.

Later on, John and Fizz are in her doorway in the street, saying good-bye after a nice meal. Chesney walks down the street just in time to see them kiss. When Chesney asks her about it, she tells him that it is not what he thinks it is. Chesney is disappointed that it really truly is over between Kirk and her (and not, as I would be grossed out that my sister is dating my teacher). Fizz promises to tell Kirk, and Chesney promises to stay quiet until she does.

Star Crossed Lovers Part Two

Deirdre, having seen Eileen and Jerry have a lovely time at the Rover’s, suggest that the two might be more than mates. Eileen scoffs. Later, she is flirting with Pat when Jerry comes in, bringing in his equivalent to chocolates and flowers: a giant kebab and a can of pop. Jerry asks her if that was her “fella” on the phone, and Eileen says, nope, just a customer. 

In Other News

Deirdre and Ken are in love.  


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14 Responses to Update- Friday, March 7, 2008- The I am Glad Nothing Major Happened Update

  1. antik says:

    Don’t know if it was Friday or Thursday’s episode.. but there was a scene that delivered a surreal moment of realization.. about just how thoroughly Canadian one is.. .. Anyone else do a quick head-shake when Ashley snuck up on Claire as she roller-painted the livingroom wall.. and asked if she wanted a brew.. Claire says.. let’s go crazy and have a beer.. .. took me til the next time-zone to realize.. ‘brew’ and ‘beer’ are not synonymous “over there”.. .. This truly is the best country in the world.. so many different words for.. us suds!

    Anyroad .. don’t think much of Fizz’s new fella.. I’m pulling for Kirkey.. .. Loving the Eileen & Gerry chemistry.. .. and Audrey’s right about David needing a ‘short, sharp shock’ ..

    Thanks for pointing out Kirk’s Meatloaf singalong while serving same .. that nifty little detail got past me.. despite the multiple viewings..
    later.. k

  2. missusmac says:

    Somehow I missed David setting the paper on fire. When the headmaster showed up at Beth’s party, I thought he was there to say David was a genius — he’d aced his tests despite never going to school.

    See, this why I don’t write for Corrie.

    Best line of the night, as recounted by John: Cilla leeringly to a pretend-political campaigning John “If you want my vote Tory boy, you have to come in and earn it.” ewwww, ewwww, ewwww.

    Does anyone else find Grandpa really gruesome? I keep waiting for his teeth to fall out. Blanche is too good for him.

  3. geenee says:

    I loved that bit about Cilla and the Tory canvasser; would have loved to see his face.

    Grandpa really is gruesome; Blanche deserves better.

    What does a kid have to do to get expelled? Lighting a fire isn’t good enough?! Gail will probably offer another bribe to the little swine but asking Jason to do what she can’t is not reasonable.

  4. beanie says:

    I love Kirk as “The Kareoke Butcher” and he looks good in his wee outfit!! I hope they include many scenes with him in the shop!!!

  5. Kunzie says:

    It’s interesting how John Stape has earned the distrust of so many readers here! I’m now waiting for some sort of “reveal” that he really is controlling or unbalanced in a serious way. I suppose if that turns out to be the case, it will be “Kirk Saves the Day”. The point of all that could be that, through standing on his own two feet, Kirk grows. And he and Fiz are meant to be together (??).

    It’s not David that bothers me, it’s Gail. Incapable of tough love, unable to recognize her son’s utter contempt of her and submissive to a 16-year-old. I’d kick him out. Period.

    Daniel’s snotty, bratty treatment of Ken this past week was, I suppose, realistic and predictable. What would have been a really weird twist would have been if they had bonded.

    And for anyone else in Toronto, tough it out. IT HAS TO MELT SOMETIME.

  6. pip says:

    Yeah, I still don’t see what the problem with John is other than he might be playing ‘hard to get’, he’s leaving it to Fiz to make a lot of the first moves.

    Gail is a crappy mother, but there’s more than bad-mothering behind David’s behavior. He seems to be a psychopath. He has never shown a whit of remorse for any harm he’s done, nor any understanding of the feelings of others. I still wonder whether he was behind the fire at Claire’s and the disappearance of Freddy.

  7. mare says:

    agree about gail. but!

    a behavioural contract is actually a not uncommon pedagogical tool – be it mandatory attendance, or homework, or not being a jerk in school (i think the actual term is defiance and disruptive behaviour that negates a positive learning environment). it gets signed by the administration, the student and the parent.

    still though, you’d think david would’ve been suspended or expelled by now.

  8. whitehorsefan says:

    I could see how a behavioural contract would help a kid who is not taking school seriously, or acting out, and not really paying attention to the consequences. But I too think that David is far beyond that.

    And I also agree with Pip that David’s problem is not just a completely inept mother. He does have the markings of a sociopath, and I am not a psychologist, but it seems those are born they are not made.

  9. mare says:

    oh, i agree. the school’s well shot of him. i can’t imagine having to teach with that smirk in the back of the classroom. blech. my comment was just to clarify what a behavioural contract is and how it usually works. 🙂

    i’ll go back to lurking and reading now, having made my obligatory yearly comment 😉

  10. Michigander Fan says:

    See, but here’s the thing: THERE ARE NO CONSEQUENCES. After the fire incident (and is it just me, or did the teachers overreact? 2 teachers, rushing over with 2 fire extinguishers? Come on!)

    Anyhoo… after the fire incident, the principal shows up and says that David is “excluded” from school, except he can finish up his exams, if he signs the behavior agreement.

    Coupla things:

    1. Maybe I’m missing something, but here in the USA, an 18 YO, taking final exams, is for all practical purposes done with school. Is there another year involved that I know nothing about? Telling a graduating senior that he is expelled BUT he can take his final exams has fewer teeth than Gabby Hayes!

    2. Also, let’s see how well I remember my history: Headmaster Chamberlain offers to not do anything bad to David Hitler if he signs the non-aggression pact… hmmm. Don’t like where this analogy is going, but I think it’s apt.


  11. Michigander Fan says:

    Also, re: Grampa Wilf and his chompers: remember, British teeth, especially of a certain vintage, serve as a cautionary tale to the rest of us, a sort of “there but for the grace of God” moment. One of my favorite Simspons episodes involved the kids going to the dentist and lying about flossing. The dentist calls them liars and then shows them pictures from The Big Book of British Smiles.

    Let that be a lesson to you next time you want to go to bed without doing your ablutions!

    I think Wilf and Blanche might be very funny together! He can dish it out as well as take it, and she needs that.


  12. Michigander Fan says:

    Also, it wasn’t until I heard Kirkeh singing a Meatloaf song that I am totally unfamiliar with (being a musical dilletante) to realize: all Meatloaf songs sound exactly alike! I’m listening to the words, realizing that although I am completely unfamiliar with them, I know the tune perfectly.



  13. Michigander Fan says:

    WOW! So tonight I’m watching Corrie and Norris says “ablutions” – how weird is THAT? Ablutions is one of those words I pull out only for special occasions. How odd that it would be in a Corrie episode not 2 hours after I typed it. And I SWEAR I didn’t know in advance!


  14. beanie says:

    WOW MF!!! When Norris said that tonight I was hoping that tonights updater caught that and type it out so I could get some clue.Then I read your post!!! I think I get it now since it involves brushing teeth and using the toilet.LOL. BTW I was just checking in on this site to see if our friends ever made it out of that Irish pub

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