Update for the Week of May 18, 2008 aka “I’m not gonna be ignored.”

From Flaming Nora’s update of the week of August 20, 2007. Again, commentary added by yours truly in italics.

Casey’s spotted at Ashley’s bedroom window by nosey neighbours with wagging tongues on the Street. Kev pops round to see his mate Ash to ask him for a beer but backs off when he finds Ashley with Casey wearing Claire’s dressing gown and two wine glasses and an open bottle in the living room. Clearly putting two and two together to make what even Ashley doesn’t yet know is four, Kev tells Audrey that she needs to find out just what’s going on. Audrey has a firm but gentle word with me-laddo and when Ashley tells her that it’s none of her business, she says: “Oh, but I beg to differ, and so would your father” which was a really nice touch. Casey collars Audrey outside the salon in the middle of a Manchester thunderstorm and tells her to mind her own business. It was really spooky, the thunder was crashing, the wind was howling, Casey’s eyes were narrowing, it was all very Wizard of Oz.

David lies and tells everyone on the Street that he and Mel Morton are an item. Sarah warns Mel off David and David’s jilted at the cinema with two big tubs of popcorn all to himself. He later tells Amber that he dumped Mel after he’d been sleeping with her and of course this news finds its way back to Mel in the kebab shop where dad Jerry takes matters into his own hands. He storms in to see Gail to tell her to keep an eye on young David, or else, and Gail marches David by the scruff of the neck to apologise to Mel and to Jerry. David then climbs up on the garage roof and takes imaginary shots from an invisible gun at his mum, sister and gran while Jason tries to talk him down. He’s such an evil, scary lad that David Platt, but I don’t half feel sorry for him. As Audrey calls time between Sarah and David arguing in the hair salon she says, with a flourish: “Ooh, I feel just like Boutros Boutros Gali!”. Who? Indeed. Apparently he was the Secretary General of the United Nations but perhaps not as adept as peace keeping in a hair salon as the lovely Mrs Roberts.

Originally, David’s issues could be chalked up to childhood neglect and feelings of abandonment. Now, it just seems he just needs a girlfriend. I do hope, however, that he doesn’t end up “settling” for Amber who could do much better. Sadly, her choices of local boys are either David or Darryl, one lives in the garage, the other in a shed. Neither one would be considered a catch.

But, in the words of Audrey, honestly, David. Your family doesn’t pay enough attention to you. Boo Frakkin’ Hoo. As you’ve said yourself on Christmas Day, you’re 16. Grown up enough to make your own choices in life. You’d think one of those choices would be to stop punishing the family for not providing you with your idealised childhood.

Carla tells Sally that Rosie’s decided to work full-time at the factory and she’s not going to go back to School. “Oh yes she is” says Sally to anyone who’ll listen and even Kev gets involved and makes his voice heard, trying to get Rosie to see sense and not throw away her highly priced education on some low budget pants job. The Websters head off en famille to Greece for their holidays with Rosie tagging along after Sally makes her pay her own way now that she’s earning. Best line of the week was from Rosie to Amber telling her all about her new job: “A full-time job means a full-time fashion commitment” she says as she swans along the Street, all a-la-mode Primark with a hint of New Look.

Sudden holiday to Greece? Sure it’s off-season, but take note, the Websters are moving up in the world. I also noticed something this week: I had forgotten that Kevin’s garage is officially called Websters’ Auto Centre, with the apostrophe at the end, indicating the business belong to more than one Webster, even though it’s completely Kevin’s business. This, you’ll recall, was Sally’s idea back when she decided to be his personal assistant for all of 15 minutes. It’s funny to see that it’s stuck.

Also, Rosie is exhibiting the same approach to business that some of the more buxom applicants use on The Apprentice: that a low-cut blouse and a short skirt will get you far in the corporate world. It’ll only get you so far, until it’s clear that you don’t have much else to offer like education or experience. Carla may dress to the nines but she at the very least shows a willingess to learn the business. After all, it’s been months since she killed a Pole.

Leanne still needs £20k to keep the pizza burning and the red wine flowing at the restaurant. Paul Clayton says he’ll invest and Leanne doesn’t take him too seriously at first wondering how he’s going to raise the cash but Paul’s got a plan, one that involves fleecing his granddad Jack Duckworth for all that he’s worth. Well, he is Terry’s son and we should never forget it.

It’s a special kind of scum who fleeces his grandparents for money.

Poor Jack. It’s his and Vera’s Golden Wedding anniversary this week and it’s left to Molly and Paul to make all the arrangements as Tyrone’s in Spain visiting his mum in Benidorm jail after she was caught shoplifting some flip-flops. I once saw someone shoplift some flipflops, but it wasn’t Jackie Dobbs. And I thought to myself, if someone really needs to shoplift flipflops then they probably really need them, for whatever the reason, so I’m going to keep quiet and say nowt.

In her new job at the care home, Cilla gets an official reprimand after being nasty to one of the old men, Frank Nichols. But when she finds out it’s Frank Nichols of the famed Nichols’ Tickets and he’s worth a bob or two, well, she’s hitching up her skirt (ugh), showing off her stocking tops (retch), and flashing him her boobs (oh stop it now! now!). Frank, however, is tickled pink with the attention and the stocking tops, particularly the stocking tops, and asks Cilla to take a full-time job as his carer after admitting that yes, he is stinking rich. “You’ve got the first part right” she replies.

Norris, George and Ivor chat about Norris’ mystery woman, the one he wants to propose to. When Emily comes into the Rovers, George and Ivor assume she’s the one as Norris rushes to the bar to buy his landlady a drink and is aghast when his new mates wind him up about the fragrant Aunty Em. (Oh, and as this is my last ever update, I’m not going to miss a final opportunity to say this: BRING BACK SPIDER!).

Michelle asks Steve to go on holiday to Ireland to meet her mum. She tells Steve that Ireland’s a lovely place, very romantic and I’m sure it is too, to be sure. It seemed to do the trick for my parents when they were in Glendalough all those long years ago, strangely enough about the time of my conception. I’m still grateful that they weren’t in Tipperary.

Oh, and Michelle’s still tormenting Steve about Shania and Dev’s still off salad cream.


About shatnerian

Former Maritimer living in the suburbs of Montreal.
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22 Responses to Update for the Week of May 18, 2008 aka “I’m not gonna be ignored.”

  1. Michigander Fan says:

    Random thoughts:

    Watching David play Jason, all I could think was my dad’s expression – “he’s having a battle of wits with an unarmed man.”

    David certainly crossed a line this week – the scene on the roof was pretty scary and intense. Great acting by that kid.

    I kind of enjoyed watching Sarah screw David over – she has learned that she cannot take David’s behavior to Gail, so she dealt with him on his level.

    Audrey’s on the job – hopefully she’ll sort out this Casey fiasco quickly.

    Michelle and Steve are going to Ireland? How DO these people pay their bills? Seriously!

    Meijers Thrifty Acres DOES sell Salad Cream (in their International Section…ooooh). However, it’s 2 bottles for $9. At those prices, the LAST thing I need is to try it and like it! But thanks for the info about the product.

    Michigander Fan

  2. Michigander Fan says:

    OH – and Eileen and Gerry going out on a date – hope that works out for her. I have dated Gerry (well, not actually, but you know what I mean) and I don’t think it will end up working out in the end. His lackadaisical attitude will get to her, eventually. Although in the short term, I can really see her enjoying being able to cheese Gail off from a closer proximity.


  3. the pink lady says:

    I thought it was a riot that it was suggested that David move into the garage where the wonderfully devious and evil, yet unsuccessful Richard Hillman tried to kill him. Flippin’ sweet! Is it any wonder why he hates his family so?

  4. Jody says:

    Is it just me or does anyone else think that CBC is too damn slow in posting those weekly episodes for us to watch?

  5. Gayle says:

    I felt a little bit sorry for David. Gail is a crap Mum. I don’t understand why she encourages Sarah to have an elaborate wedding(who is paying for it?) For a single mother working as a receptionist I’m sure she doesn’t make much money. Why don’t Sarah and Jason move into the garage or better yet…get their own place! Bethany shares a bedroom with her mother and her lover ugh. Why didn’t Gail move the kid into her room. Even though what David said about Mel (who I like) was vicious, Gail could have handled it in a much better way, if I had ever done to my son what she did to hers he would never forgive me. Steve going on another trip? He must be loaded.

  6. glacia says:

    I actually felt seriously sorry for David…I thought Gayle and Sarah were complete bitches to him.

  7. Gayle says:

    Glacia – I agree 100%, they were complete bitches.

  8. pip says:

    I agree Sarah was horrible to David, but he was getting a little of his own back. That was a nasty lie he spread about Mel and he deserved to have to apologise to her in public. Unfortunately, it’s just turning him into a serial killer/mass murderer. I wonder who Jason is going to tell about their little conversation?

    I really can’t stand Michelle. She is soooo bossy and controlling.

    I felt so sorry for Leanne when Liam snuck out on her. She is trying to make an honest living and working her *ss off (rather than simply working it). Can’t a girl catch a break?

  9. geenee says:

    I too felt sorry for David. He is a little swine, but they should have at least asked him if he wanted the garage. It would have made a lot more sense for Sarah and Jason to get a place of their own rather than spend all their money on a wedding. It should be the registry office after the last fiasco. And Mel should have called him and made her excuses rather than standing him up. I can see him being angry and telling that story just to save face and his apology should have been just with the Mortons, not a whole crowd.

    The garage must have very bad memories for all of them but they are too wrapped up in themselves to see it.

    I loved Cilla in the maid costume – great sense of comedy.

  10. pip says:

    I agree the garage incident was a bad move on Gail’s part, now that I understand David was almost murdered in it. Why do they still live there??? As for the private apology to Mel, well, David started it by telling a lie to Amber that he probably thought would get spread around as juicy gossip. He behaved badly in a public way, so he makes a public apology. I felt bad for Mel, though.

  11. romeozulu says:

    Random thoughts:

    I love the developing David storyline – an interesting character with loads of background (unlike a “villain” they parachute into the show eg. Charlie). Fun to watch what they’ll do with him.

    Although nasty, it was nice to see Sarah portrayed as something other than an absolute idiot.

    I’m enjoying the Paul – Leeanne scenario.

    I was scared for a couple of minutes that Liam was going to recieve a “Corrie makeover” – a 180 degree personality reversal – and make nicey-nicey with Leeanne. A recent example being Jamie’s tenderness towards Leeanne, after she SCREWED HIS DAD. Gimme a break.

    Nice to have a week away from the Saddest Girl In The World.

    I’m beginning to like the Botox Boss.

    Missed Rosie in her underwear. Maybe in Greece.

  12. glacia says:

    I love Cilla re-invented as Anna Nicole Smith.

  13. geenee says:

    LOL glacia! You must admit she does a great job. There won’t be as much fun when she leaves. Maybe Tyrone’s mom will be the new Cilla – though I don’t remember her as being funny – just brazenly dishonest.

  14. pip says:

    You know, every time I see Sally criticize Rosie’s life choices in front of Kevin, I cringe thinking that one day Sally is going to incence her daughter so much that Rosie lets loose about Sally’s choice to have a fling with her boss (was his name Ian), not so long ago. Sally seems to have completely forgotten about that.

    Is it my imagination, or has Cilla lost weight too (just like Molly and Janice).

  15. Gayle says:

    Pip, I was thinking the same thing about Rosie and knowing about the affair. It is obvious that Rose lost respect for her mother.

  16. missusmac says:

    I didn’t think the three witches conversation was all that bad… certainly a believable and harmless conversation that three generations of older, wiser, been-27-times-around-the-block females might have about a much younger relative’s love life. David wasn’t meant to hear it, nor would they likely have said it knowing he was there.

    Cilla just cracked me up. Who says things to old people like that???? Only Cilla.

    Where is the Norris storyline going? Undying love for (a) Rita (b) Doreen (c) Emily

    Or could this be a new Eileen storyline?

  17. Mandy says:

    Here’s my thoughts!

    I HATED seeing Sarah do that to David. I understand he’s a messed up guy, but being vindictive like that wouldn’t solve anything. I want to see Sarah TRY to be nice to him and do things with him, and then if that doesn’t work, MOVE OUT. It’s time for her and Jason to move out, anyway.

    However, the whole “fake gun” thing that David did was really scary. I wouldn’t trust him.

    And moving him into the basement where he almost died? That’s ridiculous. But why can’t David just express to Gail that it would be traumatic to go in there, instead of being a little bitch?

    Rosie is being very idiotic right now. Sure, this job might seem cool now. She’s earning her own money and feeling all important… but when she realizes she’s gone as far as she can go in that job, she’s going to regret not finishing high school. You’d be hardpressed to find a job that will accept you without at least a high school diploma in the real world, for a full-time position instead of just a summer one.

    Those are the main things!

  18. pip says:

    David is such a psychopath that I think the only person who can have any effect on his behavior is a psychopath stronger than him (for example, Charlie Stubbs). David views being treated kindly as a sign of weakness in the other person and an opportunity to exploit them. The only way to deal with David is to get him out of your life.

    I agree Sarah and Jason need to move out. Sally should kick Rosie out or at least start charging her room and board. Then send Sophie to private (public?) school, but maybe not Oakhill.

  19. robswizzle says:

    David isn’t doing for me as a villain, though I fear we have years left in his character. He’s such a ratboy, even Bethany would have a good shot at drowning him in a bathtub.

  20. Mandy says:

    I’m not sure… I think there’s lots of times where if people showed David genuine kindness he’d show it back. Like in this week’s episode where Gail asks him what he’s doing, and he talks about the door game… “Pick a door, any door”. I wanted her to play along for a laugh and then maybe ask him to do something nice with her. I mean, it’s like Gail has given up.

  21. beanie says:

    Maybe Norris has the hots for Becky. He seemed quite chummy when trying to find out the skinny on Steve. A really amusing moment. Regardless of the reasons…David is mentally ill. If something isn’t done about him it will end badly.Gail,Sarah and Audrey should be concerned about Bethany.Oddly, Jason that big wad of DUH seems to be the only that cares.

  22. missusmac says:

    “That big wad of DUH”… hahahahahahaha!

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