Don’t Let The Door Hit Your Ass On The Way Out of the UK – Update

You know, the best line of the night last night was when Lloyd announced that Cilla was celebrating the inheritance she got from Young Mr. Grace.

I have spent all day trying to figure out some clever tie-in wiht Corrie and AYBS…but the reality was my pussy wasn’t feeling well so my mind was elsewhere.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaanyway

Cilla is off to Las Vegas and she tells Chesney to take the day off from school so they can spend some quality time together.  She takes this time to reminisce about all the monkey-shines they got into over the years what with social workers and what not…good times good times.   She also admits that she’s been a crap mom but takes the time to give him all the advice he’ll need to carry him through life.

If you can do well in school, but not too well.  If  you eat your vegetables and take after goody-two shoes, not me. Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it, And – which is more – you’ll be a Man my son!

Finally she re-enacts any number of chapters from  Irish literature and waxes romantic about when she she’s set up and ‘sends for’ Chesney she’ll meet him at the airport in a Mustang convertible and hire Celine Dion to hold up a sign that says, ‘Welcome to America’ spelled out in diamond studded chips.

Once her bags are packed, she tells Kir-keh that there is an envelope for Fizz but not to give it to her until she has left.   Then she’s off to the Rovers to buy  the townsfolk a round on her, her way of saying ‘Ciao losers. Oh and sorry for that wee bit of charity fraud back there.’ before she’s off to Vegas, baby, VEGAS.

Fizz stops by the house because she’s heard that Chesney didn’t go to school.  While she’s there Kirk-eh lets it out that Cilla is off to America (where she won’t be largesse, but considered rather ‘svelte’.).  Fizz sees her ticket and realizes that it’s a one way deal.

She marches over to the Rovers and lets into Cilla about what a crap mom she is and how she can’t believe she’d leave Chesney alone.   Cilla pops a ‘Whatever.’ attitude and all but holds an impromptu Bar Mitzvah for Chesney to prove that at 13 he’s ready to survive on his own.   Fizz says she can’t believe people would take a drink from Cilla which prompts one and all to put down the money for their own drinks.

Cilla storms out, says her goodbyes to Chesney and no amount of guilt from leaving her son to fend for himself, or Lloyds comments dis-way her and she is off to the airport and out of our lives for good.

You know, I  kind of hate the way they wrote her out of the show.  I wish they hadn’t made her such a bag right up to the end.   I was hoping for the Anna Nicole ending, but with Chesney being taken care of.

And Other Women I Hate

Leanne brags to Roger about how she can afford to put out a big ad for the restaurant now.  He wonders if maybe she can pay back some of HIS LIFE’S SAVINGS now that he’s OUT OF WORK and the BILL COLLECTORS are like wolves at his door.

Leanne thinks that Roger should talk about something else than money.   Why’s he got to ruin everything with talk of living expenses?  She further suggest to Janice that Roger is only hanging around Janice until he gets his money back.

(Wait, wasn’t there some suggestion before that JANICE was only dating Roger because Leanne owed him money?).

Anyway, Janice confronts him with this and he assures her that he’s in it for the sex, not the money.   And all is well again.

In Other News

Jody is pissed at (moveout) Gerry because he’s (moveout) sticking to his guns about going (moveoutofyourparentshouse) Milan.   He reminds her that she gets (moveoutforgodssake) free room and board (independencerocks) from him.

Rosie hasn’t signed up for school yet.  Sally is developing a nervous rash about this.

Oh yeah, Tyrone and Paul are still at odds.

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15 Responses to Don’t Let The Door Hit Your Ass On The Way Out of the UK – Update

  1. geenee says:

    Well I’m glad they didn’t kill Cilla off and hope she comes back someday. She is selfish and admitted it but an interesting, funny character thanks to the actress.

    Jerry is almost as selfish. Sure, he looks like a hero, supporting all those kids – but Jodie seems to have most of the responsibility. He talks the talk… but does he walk the walk?

    I’m disappointed that Tyrone won’t move out!

  2. kunzie says:

    My pu……..wha????

    That’s it; I’m having Glacia write all my sick-notes from now on.

  3. glacia says:

    I now realize and HOPE the majority of the readers out there are familiar with ‘Are You Being Served’.

  4. John says:

    I think it was as fitting an exit as could be for that character. I don’t think she was ever going to change and knowing that, I think all that was left was for her to become more and more unpleasant.

    For me, the most interesting character in this storyline was Chesney. The guy gave his mother permission to abandon him, even if I’m pretty sure what she did was illegal. I don’t know what kind of emotional state a 13 year old has to be to do that. I think he realised that as much as he loved his mum, despite everything she’s done, her leaving was probably a good thing for him. He knows there are enough people on the street who’ll look out for him (Fizz, Kirk, the Croppers, even the Websters).

    But I think this is the event in his life that has permanently hardened. He’s going to have serious trust issue when he gets older.

  5. Gayle says:

    John, I agree with your comments. A woman like Cilla will just get harder as she ages, picking up loser after loser (as we know Les won’t be back). There was nowhere for her character to go. But I have a feeling that someone on the street will be contacting social services. And my big question is what the hell is the kid supposed to live on…pay rent, hydro, phone groceries, he is only 13!

  6. Margaret says:

    Chesney is wise beyond is 13 years. And as John says the most interesting character. And his portrayer was brilliant. He conveyed so much with his eyes and facial expression.

    It was almost too much when Cilla said that’s it — he has to be in bed by half 11 (!!!) on school nights when he said he was tired.

    The aawwwww moment for me was when our Kirk of all people hugged him. That’s what Chesney could never get from Cilla — and all he so clearly wanted.

    Surely Fizz will step in and move back in and perhaps apply for official guardianship?

  7. pip says:

    I can’t believe Cilla wouldn’t even hug her son before she left. All the folk in the pub who insisted on paying for their own drinks when they found out what Cilla was up to – they rocked! And Lloyd quietly challenging her about leaving Chesney behind, he rocked the most. I really like Lloyd, he’s up there with Kevin and Steve and Tyrone in my books.

    Jodie is 28!!! I know she looks that old but I thought she was supposed to be playing a younger character. I suppose she’s never moved out becaus she felt she was needed at home, with the result that Jerry just takes her for granted. She’s old enough to know better, and if this doesn’t make her move out . . .

  8. geenee says:

    Chesney might turn out OK. Fizz is as capable and sane as anyone else on the street, gainfully employed and keeps on eye out for Ches. She was raised by various foster families when Cilla was off with one of her men friends. It’s sad to think that so many kids are raised that way but Cilla just reflects what’s happening in life.

    The other kids on the street with full-time mothers don’t always turn out that great eg. Tracy, David, Terry. Roy and Haley are good people that had troubled childhoods.

  9. glacia says:

    full-time mothers don’t always turn out that great eg. Tracy, David

    Tracy and David had shit moms, so i’m wondering if Chesney really is better off without Cilla.

  10. beanie says:

    I was a bit surprised to hear Jodie is 28 but honestly don’t know how old I THOUGHT she was. Older or younger? When she first arrived and hired Jason to reno the kebab shop, I though she was older and the owner. When Jerry first appeared….I though he was her husband. She’s really quite a chamelian(sp) If she’s 28 then she must have been playing nanny since about 21 because R Finlay (I’m pretty sure he’s not Jerry’s)is about 6 isn’t he? The twins and the invisable one would have been pretty young and since the mom was a slapper Jodie probably always played mommy.

  11. missusmac says:

    I wonder at the show background that led to Cilla’s departure. The story line with her at the old guy’s could have been good, then he abruptly dies. It’s sort of like Martin’s hurry up and leave with this new woman story line… wonder if there were contract problems?

    Who will be the street harridan now? It used to be Janice, but Cilla inherited almost everything from her!

  12. geenee says:

    I just read someplace that Wendy Peters (Cilla) was tired of commuting to London, where she lives. I also read that Teresa, Jerry’s ex, is going to be the new harridan, but with Carla, who needs another?

  13. Gayle says:

    Speaking of “shit Moms” Tyrones was one of the worst. Convict, con-artist and look how well he turned out.

    I agree with Pip, I really like Lloyd, Tyrone and Kevin (except I wish he would get Sally off her high horse).

    I also think Chesney is a lovely lad.

  14. missusmac says:

    Thanks Geenee. So Teresa’s coming on board huh? Explains Jerry’s repeated references of “just like your mother” to Jody in the past few days.

    I thought Jody was the restaurant owner too when she had Jason make renovations. Question: you have a kid, then wait 10 years to have 2, then 3 or 4 more? Whaaaaat? The twins are only 18 aren’t they?

    I was actually kind of weepy about Cilla’s departure. I love it when a crap mom KNOWS she’s a crap mom, and feels an eensy bit bad about it.

  15. whitehorsefan says:

    “I was actually kind of weepy about Cilla’s departure. I love it when a crap mom KNOWS she’s a crap mom, and feels an eensy bit bad about it.”

    Missus, I totally agree. I thought both Cilla and Chesney did a great job. Cilla wants to be a better mom, she just can’t.

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