Ibiza, the crown jewel of The Balearic Islands
Sean tracks down Jamie and Violet in the pub and tries to give them the 500 pounds for a deposit on their flat. They politely turn him down. Later at home he tries again to give the money to Violet but she tells him that Jamie won’t accept the money. Some sort of guy thing apparently.
When Ryan comes home from school Michelle surprises him with a stack of video games. He wonders how his Mom got cool all of a sudden. She explains to Ryan that they are from his Uncle Paul, and he can play them to his heart’s content, after he finishes his homework. Later Ryan destroys Steve in a match of FIFA 2008, before Michelle sends him to bed.
Mister Stape tries to talk to Rosie about her attempt at an English essay, wondering if she had done it ‘on the bog’. Rosie thinks John is being a bit too familiar, and that she was unable to complete the requisite homework assigment as she was busy getting busy on the weekend, if you know I mean. John shows a bit of backbone and tells her that she has to do the essay again, much to the chagrin of young Rosie.
John comes by the Webster household later to give Sal her lesson, and is greeted at the door by the resident harlot. Rosie then employs a bit of blackmail to insure that she will be getting good grades without having to put out too much hard work. So to speak. When Sal is moaning in the dining room about how difficult her studies are Rosie flounces by and tells her that ‘are better ways to get a good grade’.
The Cage Dancer
A cab pulls up on the street and an attractive young woman gets out. ‘Six pound eighty’ the cab driver tells her. She gives him a passionate kiss and asks him much the fare is now. ‘Six pound eighty’ he says. She gives him a fiver and makes her way into the pub, here she proceeds to offend Betty and make a big impression on Ashley and Kevin, who she renames Norman and Enrique.
‘What kind of champagne do you have?’ she asks. ‘Newton & Ridley’ replies Betty.
‘What kind of crisps do you have? she asks. ‘Poncy’ replies Betty.
Violet and Sean come into the pub and are shocked to discover that the new strumpet of the street is none other than Lauren, sister of Violet, who has retruned from her cage dancing gig on the island of Ibiza. They have a bit of a catch up, Lauren manages to embarass both Sean and her sister when she discovers that Sean is the father of the unborn baby.
‘Get me a stiff one’ she says. ‘That’s what Violet said’ replies Sean.
Liam chases after the woman who clouted Carla, catching her in the street and calling her a mad bitch. She threatens to charge him with assault, which Liam finds somewhat ironic. It turns out that she is the ex of square chin Tony, and she claims they were still together when Tony started seeing Carla.
Meanwhile Carla is in the loo composing herself, before she makes her way back to the office, offering up an excuse to the girls about how what just happened was some sort of training exercise. Liam comes back and explains what he found out but Carla seems to be in a state of denial. Carla then phones Tony and invites him over to ‘measure the length of her skirt’. (the smurfman has heard that one many times before) The chin comes by and he and Carla hash everything out , and end up snogging on the steps of the factory, much to the disgust of Liam.
Maria, who has quite a bit on her mind at the moment, is being treated rather poorly by Liam, who is experiencing what one might call jealousy. They go to the pub, end up chatting with Michelle – who slags off Carla and her family at some length – before Maria tells Liam that she just wants to home and watch some telly in bed. He agrees, but then gets distracted by the arrival of Carla, who he has to confront about her behaviour with Tony. Carla wonders why it is any of his business, before an annoyed Maria drags him out of the pub.
Bits and Bobs
Still no sign of Dev, Deirdre, Ken and Blacnhe.