Going to The Chapel
It’s moments after Jim pounded Vern but bloodied or no, he’s determined to get to that wedding, even if it means he’s missing teeth and his white wedding cowboy suit is covered in blood. Liz, meanwhile, has asked Deirdre to tell the guests, all of whom are waiting at the registry office, that the wedding is canceled. Steve’s confused but Liz says she’ll explain later.
At said venue, Blanche is singing “Why Are We Waiting?’ and complains to her friends that she could have had another hip replacement in Poland by now. Speculation is beginning to run throught the crowd that someone got cold feet. Deirdre arrives to announce the wedding is off. There is mild shock but mostly concern over what to do with the 250 vol-au-vents Betty made.
As the guests leave, Steve arrives by taxi and tries to herd the guests back into the building (“Don’t you jostle me!” Norris protests.) as the wedding is back on.
Vern arrives with Dev, who is replacing that Noah Taylor lookalike as Best Man and is a little queasy at the sight of all the blood. Vern makes his way to the alter to tell Liz, through his bloodied, swollen jaw, that he loves her.
“Yeah, me and all,” she replies.
The celebrant declares them “man and wife” (old school) and the party makes its way back to the Rovers for the reception/New Year’s Eve party.
There, Vern calls Steve “son” and Steve thanks Vern for not calling the cops on his dad. Meanwhile, Liz admits to Deirdre that she got cold feet but saw Vern’s puppy dog eyes and couldn’t break his heart. Vern goes to make his speech but finds himself overcome with emotion. Liz takes the mic and says he’s bladdered but says that she sees this gentle, kind man and she knows she made the right decision. Well, it’s as sold a foundation as any for a marriage on this show.
If We Make it Through December
Fizz got drunk, and indicating Marcus, didn’t worry about it too much because she had a “qually fullified professional” next to her. Then she fell over sideways. Afterward, she kissed Dev at midnight. Not romance there or anything, she just wanted someone to kiss.
Liam’s still jealous of Tony, who’s stuck in
Baden-Baden Dusseldorf, and his extravagant romancing of Carla, so he asks Maria to go away with him somewhere.
Steve tells Michelle that, no matter what comes of this DNA business with Ryan, he’ll stand by her.
Eileen got Jason to stop moping about Sarah long enough to go to the pub, where he finds a drunken Becky who kisses him at midnight. He reciprocates but it leaves us with a “did they or didn’t they?” kind of affair.
At midnight, in keeping with Corrie tradition, everyone in the pub locks arms and sings “Auld Lang Syne”.
Welcome to 2008, everyone!