Boyfriend in a Coma. I Know, I Know. It’s Serious*
We open at th’ospickle in Keswick where Liam is still unconscious but recovering from his injuries. The nurse tells Maria that people often call out for their girlfriends or loved ones. Except that the name he was calling was Carla’s. Maria tells the nurse this, and she exits without a word.
Steve, Michelle, and Ryan arrive and Michelle comforts Maria and Steve does the exact same thing I do in a crisis: think about food.
Meanwhile, back at Underworld, Tony is disatisified with the quality of knickers Carla’s been supplying him. Turns out the elastics are second rate but that Liam’s department and he’s been too distracted by Maria, reckons Carla. I honestly have no idea why this place is still open.
Carla later learns of Liam’s injuries but is told to stay put. She is visibly upset in as much as Carla shows emotion.
Finally, Maria tells Michelle that Liam was calling for Carla. Michelle dismisses this as silly but Maria connects the dots: they are hot for each other and they express it through mutual loathing. Michelle doesn’t believe it but Maria persists. She says she doesn’t want to be made a fool of. Looks like all that fresh air did her some good after all.
*Not actually in a coma
And Now I Know How Joan of Arc Felt
At the Webster’s, Rosie is complaining that she is being mistreated at school and wonders when they are going to burn her at the stake. Sally wonders if that was a reference to Joan of Arc, who was burned at the stake for “Hear’say,” Michelle Connor’s old band. Well, wouldn’t you burn her at the stake for that music?
Sophie thinks if she’s comparing herself to Joan of Arc, she’s deluded. Rosie storms away from the dinner table, shoving Sophie as she goes, causing her to exclaim, “You just watch where you’re going you home-wrecking teacher-loving tart!”
Later, Rosie and Sally make a truce: Rosie will behave normally if Sally drops the self-righteous routine.
Tyrone has returned from Blackpool with a stack of real estate brochures in the Duckworths’ suddenly diminished price range (and a stick of rock candy for Paul). Later, as they go through the brochures, The Duckworths talk about old times, Ivy Tilsey, Annie Walker, and Bet Lynch (she and Jack had a thing?). It gets to be a little too much for Tyrone runs out, followed by Molly. He tells her that it all just hit him that the Duckworths are leaving.
He and Molly talk for a while and realise that they are living their own memory lane and as long as Tyrone has his job at the garage and the Rovers and Molly, he’s happy.
The Girl With The Thorn in Her Side
At the clinic Gail meets young Tina McIntyre who not only shares the same name as half the girls in my high school, she is also a bit of on the sarcastic side.
And because I was looking for stuff about Blackpool and tangentially referencing the Smiths, I found this, from the BBC TV series “Blackpool”:
Now I see why the Duckworths want to move there: the constant breaking out into song.