Update for Tuesday, August 2011. If Loving Yourself Was a Country, You’d Be Africa

David has been arrested for the attempted murder of Graeme Proctor and is led away in the police.

At th’hospickle, Tina is talking to an u

nconscious Graeme when a nurse comes in to say his brother called from America and was having trouble getting flights. Tina looks confused.

Audrey comes over the Gail’s to talk about David and she mentions the pricey solicitor she got for him.

At the station, the cops are interviewing David who still claims that he doesn’t remember anything (rather sincerely, I think). The cops aren’t buying it, even when they try to see it from his side. The solicitor says his client has been in hospital and really can’t remember any more questions.

Gail finds Tina at the hospital and they talk about what happened with David. She gets Tina’s side of the story and Tina says that, in the end, David isn’t capable of rape. Attempted murder, on the other hand…

David is released on bail and comes home. He repeats his claim that he doesn’t remember hitting his friend with his car.

“I want to believe you,” Gail says.

“Gee, thanks Mum. You’re the best,” David replies.

Claire is trying to convince Ashley to move to France where he can master the fine art of charcuterie. He resists, saying he can’t speak French, the locals won’t want some immigrant taking their jobs, it’s all unions over there, etc. etc.

Claire says Ashley is being a Little Englander (you can see examples of Little Englanders in the comments section the Daily Mail). He says he’s guilty as charged and storms off to the pub for a pint of warm bitter and Britain’s finest hot pot. Yvonne tells Claire not to worry, he’ll come around. Claire agrees.

“I deserve my happy ever after,” Claire says.

There he meets Lloyd and Steve who indulge him in his Little Englander ways. They say this issue is his Agincourt, his Waterloo.

“We will fight them on the beaches…” Steve says, imitating Churchill.

“That was the Germans,” Ashley corrects.

“Well, them and the French, that Sarkozy and Merkel, they’re all best mates now.”

“Who needs them with their cafés and their shrugging and their existentialism?” asks Lloyd.

Buoyed by this, Ashley goes home and announces to Claire that swapping houses was one thing but swapping countries is another.

In Other News

Carla re-mortgaged the flat to buy Nick out of his shares. And she’s drinking again.

Jason is doing the Websters kitchen. When he removes his shirt, Rosie criticizes his less than ideal physique and Jason defends himself.

“You fancy yourself,” Rosie says. “If fancying yourself was a country, you’d be Africa.”

Roy gave Kylie another chance at the café but she’s hitting clubs and leaving Max with Steve and Becky.

In other other news, Transport for Greater Manchester Metrolink has announced that the Weatherfield Branch Line off Cornbrook has recently re-opened which will allow more frequent access to Manchester City Centre.

 

 

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About shatnerian

Former Maritimer living in the suburbs of Montreal.
This entry was posted in Coronation Street Updates and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

10 Responses to Update for Tuesday, August 2011. If Loving Yourself Was a Country, You’d Be Africa

  1. haili says:

    I preferred a shirtless Jason to tacky Rosie and he looked pretty fit to me.

    Loved Steve and Lloyd giving Ashley tips on how to talk to Claire – and Ashley following their advice. He looked so happy when he spoke his mind and told her he’s staying put. If only he would stick to it but knowing Ashley he’ll soon cave.

    I also liked David’s remark to Gail, reminding her that he believed her when everyone thought she killed Joe.

  2. beanie says:

    WTF was Rosie wearing? She must have been taped into that top of she would have popped out. Mr. Bean now uses Papa Smurf’s phrase. There’s Rosie and her jubblies. LOL

  3. haili says:

    Now I get the space reference. Rosie is a space cadet at the best of times, but tonight’s show explained the theme of the photo shoot.

    Poor David looked quite tormented tonight. Gail had her usual sour expression. Thank goodness for granny.

  4. Wendy says:

    There’s always a first time for everything so I actually think David is telling the truth for once… Perhaps an undiagnosed brain tumour is causing his blackouts…?

  5. eila says:

    I’d have to tune out a lot if Gail was my mother!

  6. Bea says:

    If loving yourself were a country, I’d be Ireland. lol

  7. Long Time Lurker says:

    Who hasn’t Jason slept with??
    And Rosie, Rosie – that top; honestly, for a moment I thought I saw a nip-slip.
    And Kylie – do you have any redeeminq qualities at all, except maybe Max.
    And yes, I too am believing David these days – perish the thought.

  8. Gayle says:

    Long time lurker, I agree with your comments completely. I cannot stand Kylie! She is horrid. I just want to reach into the tv and slap her LOL!

    Rosie’s top was something else that’s for sure. She is a really pretty girl and does not need to dress like that. She certainly isn’t the.sharpest knife in the drawer/

  9. missusmac says:

    I admit to a certain fondness for David. He is evil, but he tells it like it is most of the time. Gail is a cow, she does treat her other two children better, she did bring a serial killer and a seriously damaged man into their lives, and I think he deserves a little resentment that Gail and Tina arranged an abortion before he had a chance to know about the pregnancy. I truly believe he knows Graham is his only friend — Gary doesn’t count! — and he would never do anything to him. I also believe he really loved Tina, he mis-read Tina’s signals, and was horrified at his own actions.

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