Update for the week ending February 24, 2012

Four months, eight days behind…

This song was on the jukebox this week (Kirsty Maccoll wrote it but this version has a video).

It’s the week of Eileen’s 50th birthday and Rosie has helped her with her dating profile. Rosie pointed out that you never reveal your real age, your job, or anything else truthful. So she took Eileen’s head shot and had it photoshopped. By she didn’t have Eileen erase her full name from the profile so expect lots of new stalkers, Eileen!

Eileen does get a date and arranges to meet him at her house (mistake #2 – In a café, Eileen! In a café!). What she doesn’t know is that her friends at the factory chipped in for a banner reading “Happy 50th Birthday Eileen!” which was flung across the factory’s balcony.

In her rush to get the banner down, she gets her head stuck in the balcony railings. Her date, realizing she’s some working class stiff who’s 50, not 40, storms off. Fortunately, Eileen is rescued by the fireman, Paul, who tried to save Molly during the tram crash. He has a little more luck this time, as does Eileen, who scores a date with him.

It does seem to be going well but when she goes to his house to return a wallet, he’s quite cagey and brushes her off quickly. He later apologizes and says his brother’s wife had left him and he’s in a right state.

But later, Marcus sees Paul shopping with another woman at Frescho’s. What is going on there?

Tracy, feeling unwell, is taken to the hospital to see if the baby is alright. Baby? Make that babies as the nurse informs her there were two heartbeats on the ultrasound. So it’s either twins, or she’s carrying a Time Lord (yes, I used that joke on Twitter but it’s mine so I can repeat it if I like).

Well, this got Steve all loved up or something so suddenly he decides he and Tracy belong together after all so after a declaration of love by the canal, Steve makes his feelings known and Tracy unfurls George W. Bush’s “MISSION ACCOMPLISHED” banner over the door at Number 1.

And Becky cried in Hayley’s arms.

Ken turned 72 this week, making him as old as me mum. For his birthday, Deirdre put her mad pottery skillz to work to create a peanuts dish because as we’ve all seen, Ken is constantly eating peanuts.

“See, Ken,” she tells him. “I made the first dish a number 7…”

“And then you made a number two!” adds Tracy.

And then I spit out me tea.

Damnit, Tracy! Stop making me like you!

It’s a good thing Carla agreed to go to counselling because she’s going to need all she can get now that Frank Foster is out on bail. Fortunately, he can’t work at the factory. Unfortunately, his mother, who does not like Carla, not one little bit, can. I always thought after Paul, Tony, and Frank that Carla’s next business partner should be a woman. This isn’t what I had in mind.

Stella also confided to Carla that she, too, was raped and will be there if ever she wants to talk.

Frank, via his mummy, decided as he owned half the business, took half the assets. And that meant lay-offs. The unlucky ones included the most recently hired Becky and Eileen, and Sally. Carla reckoned due to her comfortable circumstances (grown kids, Kevin’s scratch card money), she could sweat it out.

“I’m just trying to be fair,” Carla says.

“Fair? Was it fair when I got cancer? Was it fair when my husband had a child with another woman? I used to look up to you. More fool me.”

Sian’s off to France with her mum so Amber has taken Sophie under her wing. They even went to a gay bar, leaving Sian a touch jealous and Sophie wondering why Amber seemed so comfortable there. I don’t know which team Sophie is on but if she is gay, it would be great, if only to make Dev’s head explode.

In other news, Tommy is clearly into Tina who is clearly into Dr. Carter.

Chris is recovering from his cancer but he’s not about to let Cheryl know that, not while there is a way he can pity his way back into her heart. While Lloyd watches helplessly. I don’t know if it’s going to work but he did ask Tracy when she was going to be done with her Mission Accomplished banner.